Posted by C-T Dummy on March 09, 2008 at 22:58:53
In Reply to: Re: Leaving religious groups - your experinces posted by Helena on March 08, 2008 at 07:46:33:
Well I wasn't 'young' young. I was in my mid-twenties when I left.
I was very weakened by my brainwashing, and the doubts came in parts but never quite took a foothold. I was only certain about leaving when I saw the group implode after a wave of persecution hit. It went through an internal purging equivalent to the cultural revolution. People were being dealt with for just being human. Leaders could and would find something wrong with everyone. Couples were separated, children made to move away from their parents. Lives were being destroyed.
I saw abuse of power. A shepherd I respected called Jean-Luc had his way with a girl, breaking her in for sex, when all she wanted to do was be a missionary and serve Jesus. She didn't know what sex with everyone in the home had to do with winning souls and practically got raped. I saw the beginnings of silence restrictions. I saw children in school age kept out of school and being given a sub-standard home education. I saw them being used as baby-sitters and money makers and door-openers. I saw people all around me being broken to pieces, in their place a hollow shell of nothingness, and the group considered all that a good thing, code word 'yieldedness.'
It took me 2 years to leave, because I had to make sure I could leave with everyone in my immediate family. A few times I tried to convince my partner to leave, but I was turned on, reported, and got into trouble. I finally succeedded in leaving with all of my family, but left behind friends I really loved and cared for. It broke my heart.
If I could I would shut down this group now, if I had the means and resources to. I would educate the world about the dangers of cults. My view is they are deceiving everyone, including themselves, and sucking everything around them like black hole. They take and give nothing back, even though they tell you differently. They are the worst robbers, because they steal your soul and lay your life waste.
Those who remain from the old days are more accountable than ever now, but there are probably a few idealistic nuts in there. I was one too, but I grew up and stopped pretending.