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In Reply to: Have you ever heard the term "enabling"? posted by Caveat on November 27, 2002 at 22:40:03:
as far as enabling, i don't think that is what i am endorsing. it is just that making life tougher for average fam mem's doesn't seem like a logical way to either help them find a way of escape or bring ws to any serious inconvenience. life was pretty tough even when i left 11+ yrs. ago...and that is not what made me leave. perhaps it worked for you? as you say, everyone reacts differently.
i personally try to put myself in the other guys shoes. if i treat him w/ respect as an individual, and try to hopefully disabuse him of his stereotype of a "backslider", w/o endorsing fam. stuff, and perhaps sharing something personal that might give them food for thought, who knows? i guess we all tend to relate to others w/ what we think would reach us.
i also tend to try to find guidance in the gospels...how did Jesus do it? not that i get it right very often, but i don't see much to inspire me to harrass ind. fam. mems. but that is just the way it strikes me. and heck, i don't even follow my own advice very well! ha!
