Posted by humanist on April 23, 2015 at 16:48:39
In Reply to: Re: RIP Sweet Angel posted by Witness on April 20, 2015 at 10:12:01:
very sad to hear about yet another loss. just wanted to mention that recovery groups like AA or NA can trigger people that have survived cult life because there are some similarities. I didn't used to think so. I thought these were the best support but they don't teach true independence and they have a low success rate. I used a 12 step group for some time and then found some secular groups in AA but there was still much of the dogma and the feeling that if you don't go to meetings for the rest of your life, you won't stay sober. Some need a group for a kickstart, but healthier groups that don't encourage dependence include Rational Recovery,SMART recovery, counselors/professionals sometimes recommend harm reduction. I knew a woman in her twenties that was active in an NA meeting but could not overcome cravings. she wanted to at least smoke pot and of course, that is a complete abstinence program. the sad result of that for some is it insists that pot is not okay,some meds are not okay, etc. the result is, a person decides they can't go on without something and feel like they may as well go for it and dive into drugs/alcohol. she did that and she died leaving behind a toddler and husband. my hope for any struggling with substances is that they do not limit themselves to a 12 step program but find a counselor who can direct them to a support system that does not demand eternal attendance or else, does not base its recovery from an archaic book full of religious and outdated information. they are out there! aa and na may work for some, but for others they can be very toxic. also, some that are labeled in youth as alcoholic/addict are taught they are sick and have a disease. I disagree now that I have deprogrammed from aa. You can be independent, deal with losses without rehashing them to death, some can learn to drink socially, even of those labeled as hopeless, some can benefit from harm reduction (pot in moderation vs lethal drugs). i hate to see anyone die and hope no one thinks there is only one way to recovery and that way is one where you are told you need meetings the rest of your life,absolute abstinence, dependency on and need a sponsor, need to sponsor and continue the dependency cycle.
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