In Reply to: Re: Regarding resistering the Mr. Snort game posted by Mr. Snort's secretary on March 14, 2003 at 13:20:08:
Dear Patent Office, We received your faxes and would like to point out that we do our business with the Suise Bank International. As you probably know by now the objections you raised against Mr. Snort Inc.'s registrations etc. cannot be inforced unless an application is filed in this country. Under Suise law the fact that the major banks routinely launder drug money is protected under Federal Law prohibiting individuals from revealing, 'state secrets'. The penalty for each violation carries a manditory five year prison term. Futhermore ex-President William J. Clinton and Prime Minister Jean Cretian(sic)both heartily endorse Mr. Snort products. Perhaps you are not aware of the changes underway in Canada to remove the old outdated laws and replace them with modern progressive ones. As you are probably aware todays youth are being exploited by unscupulious drug gangs that have caused untold damage to family relationships not only in America, but throughout the industrialised world. Mr. Snort is commited to making the use of recreational drugs a family thing and to providing a safe venue for todays youth to practice safe drug use under the skilled supervision of adults. It is a well known fact that young people today spend billions of dollars annually for cheap impure drugs that cause the deaths of many of them. Mr. Snort is dedicated to providing only the purest products and each lot has to pass a stringent series of laboratory tests before receiving the Mr. Snort quality seal of approval.
Mr. Snort Inc. in additional supports the following organizations with generious donations of funds and free Mr. Snort kits. The Boy Scouts, the YMCA, the YWCA, Big Brothers, MADD, as well as millions of dollars in enducements to various politicans. Expect a reshuffling of staff and quite possibly a number of layoffs in your department. Yours cordially, Mr Snort.
Ps. Maria no longer works here at Mr. Snort Inc. and any further correspondence should be addressed to our legal dept.