In Reply to: Re: Life can be tough, can't it? posted by Donny on April 15, 2003 at 12:53:58:
The social structure in the group was supposed to be different but it was the same as in the rest of the world. In your words: "even if we were nothing in the group, we were the best thing going on the planet compared to the rest of the compromising, selfish, going-to-hell world." That enough for us and yielded our freedom to make decisions and follow the stupidity of others. Thank God we woke up at some point.
We didn't take the responsibility to find out what we were supposed to be doing until we decided to leave and we have have to do that ever sisnce. We didn't have to think much because the thinking was done for us. Our decisions were only the small ones within the boundaries set for us. "God's Will" was what they had decided for us from marriage to friendship to geographical location. By accepting their word without questioning we traded off our freedom to think.
The result was and is dependency and irresponsibility in areas of critical importance. This may be the cause of the low spots we experience now that we have to deal with real life. We were addicts to the environment where critical decisions were made for us and still seem to carry the consequences of that. Since we left the group, we have had to face ALL decisions, big and small. It can get overwhelming at times.
Some people have addressed this need by joining groups but that would not work for me. Is there one recipe for all? How can I address that?