In Reply to: Commentay on "The Girl Who Wouldn't" posted by Alan on September 09, 2003 at 12:36:23:
"This letter was nothing less than the green light for wide-scale sexual coercion in the fam."
I was in the Family 1976-1999 but can't honestly agree with this statement, or if it was widespread, I was somehow amazingly spared being around it.
I am not sure when this letter was written, but I remember hating it and not understanding it either. But I can honestly say my main reaction to this letter and many others were "thank God it doesn't have anything to do with me" and also "thank God I'm not a 'leader' so this stuff has nothing to do with me." I never saw or experienced or knew anyone who did see or experience coercion to have lesbian sex.
For me, the greater coercion were the slightly less "in your face" letters that gradually shaped my opinions regarding sex. I can remember when first joining and the King Arthur letters were just coming out I was shocked but slowly came to be able to "see it" as a noble sacrifice kind of thing. But gradually what was introduced with lots of "it's all for the Lord" became less and less "noble" or "sacrificial." I remember the first times I saw the word "fuck" in a letter and I just hated it, it seemed so raw and uncouth...this is one feeling I've never lost, I just hate that kind of terminology even today.
But all that to say, I never experienced any kind of overt coercion.... rather it was the shaping of my attitudes. And sometimes I get so mad at myself for letting it happen.
I'm rambling,but that's my two cents.
- Laura