In Reply to: well - don't let it get you down posted by Acheick on January 03, 2004 at 08:59:30:
I agree with what you have to say about the values of having our differences and developing our own opinions and so on. But what I was hoping to do with this post was to open up a discussion based on observation. It is not critical of any people or their (our) different styles. It is really based on looking at the different boards and seeing the amount of anger and tearing down that goes on between a large number of ex members towards each other. I know that when people first open up and start talking about things that it is normal for lots of anger to come out.
Unlike other sites (and again, I am not referring to this site or any other exer site, SOLELY)where there is a big focus on recovery from whatever the common experience was, with exers, it seems there is an uncommon amount of hostility towards each other, even after a good while of posting.
I am wondering what causes that in many of US as exers? I see it on the MovingOn board too.
While in the family, there was so much emphasis on not building personal relationships. That would interfere with loyalty to the top. I think the family practices the closest thing I have seen in comparison to the book, 1984. We learned to betray each other and to betray ourselves.
I think most of us would like to have kinder gentler relations between each other more often (and in spite of differences), but trust is so damaged from the past. What do others think?