In Reply to: We need to recognize there are differences posted by Observer on January 03, 2004 at 12:19:06:
I am somehow not getting the subject across like I would like to. You say what many do now is fiercely defend their individuality. But there is a strong leaning towards the status quo of what opinions are "in" and what opinions are "out". (Not talking at all about the pro vs. anti family stuff, just opinions about the whole family experience as an exer.) In the family, there was also a very hypercritical stance in the "cookie cutter-ism" venue. In the family we often berated ourselves, compared ourselves to the "right" way to think and act in that system.
There was very very strong reinforcement not to step out of that norm and at the same time there was always a push that we could never do our best. Shiners and top producers were lauded and became measuring sticks and then when burned out or becoming ill, were promptly degraded. There was also a sense at times of "When was the other shoe gonna drop?" As in, walking a line of prescribed acheivement and being dealt with should your stats or performance wane a bit or something be said which was not "acceptable" enough. In the exer community, there seems to be a big resistance to different ways to believe and to view the cult experience. Because if individuality were really what people were comfortable with, then as much as I might dislike one person's viewpoint, I would be secure enough in my own not to feel "outcasted" for thinking differently.
Many people that have survived a horrific common experience have an easier time to support each other once outside of their respective trauma. I have not seen boards and such for survivors of Krishna or other cults and don't know if there are any, but if there are, it would make an interesting study to see how people communicate with each other in their exer communities.
Many of the same posters are posting for more than a year now. Many have left or don't come around much anymore. Many use pseudonyms more often than not. It is not a BAD thing. But it would seem to indicate something about TRUST and perhaps FEAR which are still huge issues in the exer community.