In Reply to: our regrets posted by Sophie (reposted) on March 20, 2005 at 21:40:39:
I see you are wanting to be positive and not be torn by guilt and oppressed by remorse, and that is a good thing. I keep going back and forth between the two. I did have some happy times, but mostly with my children, the rest of it was not so good and a lot of it was horrendous to say the least. I did want to serve God, that was my foremost intention, but then when I found out all the things I did that I thought were sacrifices to God was just a lie, my world shattered and I couldn't find any good in it. How could FFing - the big lie that we were prostituting for Jesus -ever be a good thing? It was humiliating, devastating to families, to young children and not to mention the absolutely wrong message being given to the world - how could that be positive in anyway? Then you hear about all the kids that were sexually abused by some auntie or uncle and it is the worst thing a person could do - what Jesus said about offending one of these littles ones would be better that a millstone be hung around your neck and you be dropped to the sea, comes to mind. I don't think he is too happy with those who hurt little ones and innocent people. Tell me how to see the good in all that. I can't.