In Reply to: Contemplating Sin & Forgiveness posted by Born Again Systemite on May 27, 2005 at 17:00:46:
I hope you can look at your life and see good things you have done for those of another generation and for yourself. I look at what a mess my life was and how many things affected my relationship with my children and can honestly say I worked real hard as a single parent to keep us together. I worked hard to help one put together a portfolio, to help another get on his feet after troubles and another when he was in a medical crisis and I was able to help. I helped with the meager means that I had and it came back to me in good relations with my children today.
I feel sad when I hear people refer to themselves as a sh*thead that belonged to a cult who participated in the destruction of future generations. While it is true that doctrines instituted via letters wreaked havoc and at varying ends of the spectrum family members have hurt themselves or others as a result, many of us have worked hard to turn our lives around after detoxing from the family dump.
I guess if you were in Berg's inner circle and taught classes with S.D. or something, or you were a big leader who liked hurting others and being real "sold out" while in, i can understand your seeming self-hatred, though post group there is help for you too.
But it counts for something that many people got out, many more might get eventually if I keep on moving forward and learning to LIVE life, I can celebrate for the good things in life too. I have not been the cause or contributor to destruction largely, and regret ever to have been in that group. But now I celebrate life. I celebrate my family and loved ones. Also my family of choice, my friends.
Berg always said we were nothing, just sh*t compared to God. I don't believe like that. I believe many of us were seekers that got caught up in a destructive cult not knowing what we were getting into. Also, many of us fought against the odds to get our lives together and provide for our children outside the family with little or no social skills in the beginning.
There is a time to mourn and there is also a time to dance. That time varies with different people, but now is my time to dance. I was nothing for too long.