In Reply to: Great post on staying young & alive posted by MG (reposted) on November 11, 2005 at 19:38:55:
Fran and I both suffered tremendous withdrawal symptoms while coming down from the high of the Cog - tens years with all hell breaking loose emotionally, financially, and physically (health-wise); not to mention the kids spinning off into all kinds of acting out and personal dysfunction of their own. I don't think we had any idea of how dysfunctional we really were until we got over coming out of the Cog. And it was only after a complete denounciation of the Cog that were we able to see clearly and start to take stalk. By that time were were still renting, still broke and quite a few thousand dollars in debt.
We eeked out a living doing the handyman, landscaping, yard work-tree removal thing during those ten years of recovery, took a few years to gradually bail oursleves out of debt once we did recover, took out a mortgage on a home and then worked and worked and worked and worked to stay out of debt. We've worked SO HARD that we actually have a few savings and are about to build an addition to the home that will be paid for in just a few more months. We even went to town renovating the inside of the home, as well, and that's paid for too. I hauled a garage onto the property and had it insulated and had ponds dug in the yard (one for her and two for me - hee hee.) She's landscaped the front (trellises, fences, raised flower beds etc...) and I've landscaped the back (wild willows and flowers, knee high grasses, rotting stumps and logs and broken down canoes.) We've both dug gardens and our next project will be our art shack over looking two of the ponds. We are EXTREMELY physically fit as our work is so physically demanding and can both work all day-all week and then some. It's amazing how much we've been able to accomplish since the emotional blockages have been removed.
We have entered our golden years as our youngest kids that are still in school are up and gone in the morning and then out most evenings. That pretty much leaves Fran and I to ourselves and our projects. But then again, there's the grandkids from time to time. I'm about to pursue an art career as a retirement thing and plan to use my artistic gifts to carry me through into really old age when I'm just not physically able to keep up like I can now. I'm shooting to have 20 works of art done by spring. Our home grown business has grown and grown and grown and we about to invest more in that - maybe even hire some great managers some day while we pick daisies and watch the birds in some tropical paradise.
We had strong work ethics while in the Cog but lost them while recovering from the turmoil of the Cog. We've, thankfully, regained them and made amazing progress since. Retire at 65? I don't think so!
Yes, it has been difficult to see how far behind we were compared to our neighbors but, like you've said, the process is what has been important. Hey, we know what it is to recover from spiritual abuse in high places now and besides, we've got forever to play catch up if that's what we want to do, right? Personally, I think our future here is going to be all about our grand-children - helping them to make it.
Glad you are on a journey that rejuvenates you and hope you do well in it.