I am curious about what things different people have done after leaving the Family to release painful emotions. For me, healing is coming in stages.
The first thing I noticed was very high anxiety and irrational thoughts of God out to get me or people close to me.
Next to follow was years of numbness with sudden outbursts of anger and nightmares/anxiety galore.
Sometimes depression.
Talking about "forgiveness" angered me, extremely.
Most of that has faded away now over time. I don't believe I have to "forgive" someone's acts when they are not sorry or have not said so and yet I have forgiven by my choice and NOT BY ANY DEMAND or threat of eternal damnation or bad consequence, my parents even though I was never able to hear them apologize or acknowledge very hurtful and cruel things.
I suppose I just got to a point where I realized how miserable mean people already are. I don't want my life to be consumed with the misery that anger internalized gives me.
Realistically I know it does not go away until a person is ready to let it go. Some may never fully go away.
No one is on anyone else's timetable for it either.
Here are some things that helped me with my anger early on:
DANCING loved guns and roses and very angry music. Music therapists often play more volatile music and wind it down to help people release emotions that can be destructive when held in. I released it on the dancefloor.
ART Painting and doing art projects was a good way for me to release emotions. One project I never did but would've done making sure someone was with me to assure safety, was I wanted to make a glass sculpture of an alcoholic by collecting discarded liquor bottles and beer bottles, smash them against a wall or underpass and carefully collect the fragments and make a sculpture from them of an alcoholic man with a bottle in his hand..
Didn't do it though. Don't need to now. But I do like the idea.
I am way past all that well of seemingly endless unresolved pain. Again, not perfection but not tortured by the past.
What did you or what do you do to release pain of the past?
Currently, art and music are big releases for me. That and self care like soaking scented baths and candles with music of my choice.
Putting on clean linens and sleepwear that is very comfortable and making something to drink that is soothing before bed ESPECIALLY when I don't feel like it and it seems a huge task.