In order to protect the younger generation I thought it expedient to place this public notice in order to prevent the various toy companies from cashing in on my idea.
MR. SNORT®
Mr. Snort® the is latest and coolest inovation in New Age games of skill and is based on the fashionable trend - designer drugs. Now your children can have, not only a fantastic trip in the safety of their own homes, but they can get a head start in life by being prepared to enter the fascinating and lucrative field of producing custom recreational drugs. Mr. Snort® comes equiped with 5 vials of Magic Powder® that sit in the middle the Lab Board® in their own special little rack. On the 5 sides of the the board there 5 - 1/4" by 8" grooves running parallel to the edges. Each player has their own Magic Snorter® and their very own high quality stainless steel 6" micro spoon(holds exactly 1/100th part of a gram)that sits next to their individual glass 'blending bowls' that sit directly in front of the grooves. Unlike those cheap board games out there Mr. Snort® uses real money (not included) that is placed in the evelope (Addressed Mr. Snort . . .)that sits in the secret compartment under the Magic Powder® rack. Listen carefully kids! If Mom or Dad dad discover the secret letter compartment, just tell them you were saving up to buy them a new car or something. (OK: Don't forget now. Good!) Now we get to the exciting part of the game, each player begins by going on a scavenger hunt to find Mr. Money. Good places to look include. Mom's purse - when she isn't looking, Dad's pants - when he is sleeping, little bro's or sis's piggy bank, (Don't forget to change it into paper money.) Or kid's, if you are lucky and have a pawn shop in your neighborhood you can trade in some things like sterios, radios, TVs, jewelry, CDs, etc. that you find lying around home or in your neighborhood. Exciting isn't it! (Ps. Candy is not good for you because it makes cavities and then you have to go to the dentist, and you don't want to go to the dentist, now do you! Good!) Ok, Kiddies all together now... WE LOVE YOU.. MR. SNORT® Ok! Now.. we are all set to go! On your score card notice that the headings across the top match up with the names on the vials. Coke®, Heroin®, MDA®, STP®, and THC® Each time you take a spoon from one of the vials to put in your blending bowl you put a check mark under the matching name. The Coke® vial costs $25; the Heroin® $20; the MDA® $15; the STP® $10; and the THC® $5. And kids, remember that Mr. Snort® products do not contain any fillers and are not adulterated with poison or other cheap drugs. Be sure to buy only those vials that contain the offical Mr. Snort® seal of approval. Avoid buying cheap imitations that are sold at the hotels, pool halls and on the street corners. (Tell your MOM and DAD that Mr. Snort says that you shouldn't drink alcohol, eat too much candy, or buy drugs from those nasty people downtown (or at the playground at school) because Mr. Snort says.. "Just say NO!" Ok! Good! Listen up kids! Go give Mom and Dad a great big hug and say, "I lOVE YOU!" and, "Thank you for the Mr. Snort® game." Now kids, here comes the best part of the game. Starting to the left of the,'BANKER' who puts the money in the Mr. Snort® envelope, each buys as many spoons as they can (Check the prices above.) and places them in their blending bowl. Now once everyone has finished buying their Magic Powder®, you take your spoon, put it in your bowl, and altogether you stir while saying, Party! Party! Party! Now tap out the Magic Powder® mix into your groove in the Lab Board® and get ready to start snorting. But first, don't forget to say, "Mr. Snort, WE LOVE YOU." Good! Don't forget to write down on the back of your card the things you see and experience and just how wonderful you feel, or don't feel according to that particular mix. Remember you can win valuable prizes from Mr. Snort® if your best score card entry is chosen in our monthly draw for a free, all expenses paid trip to Disneyland. Now kiddies remember now that sometimes, if you were BAD, the Magic Powder® mixes can make you sick. So if you're at the hospital and the doctor or nurse asks you if you were playing with Mr. Snort® you're supposed to say, "Who is Mr. Snort." otherwise they might not let you play with your friends anymore. And we don't want that, now do we! Noooooo! Don't forget now, that if you want to win that free trip to Disneyland make sure that the Mr. Snort envelope (with the money in it) is sent in with your groups entries. If one of you wins remember that EVERYONE in your group gets to go. Wow! Now kids if your folks say you can't have a Mr. Snort game of your own, tell them that you promise to do your homework every school night, cut the grass every weekend, clean your room without being asked, wash the dishes without grumbling, and clean the kitty litter box once a day. If that doesn't work consider spending a lot of time over at your friends place so you can play with their Mr. Snort® game. Remember! Party! Party! Party!
Mr. Snort® Magic Powder® Magic Snorter® and Lab Board® are registered trade marks of Mr. Snort Inc.
This fact sheet is copyright 2003 by Mr. Snort Inc. All Rights Reserved. Mr. Snort® is not affiliated with Nintendo Corp or any of their subsiduaries.