In Reply to: Re: No posted by susie on October 18, 2006 at 19:40:10:
I agree with your assessment--I'm just not up to arguing with Lydia and Achieck over whether spanking is OK when done within limits. You're talking about the principle of nonviolence, and they're talking about the nitty gritty of parenting small children.
As a matter of principle, I don't believe in hitting kids, but I've been known to do it on occasion when my anger and frustration got the better of me. Some people say, "Never hit a child in anger." To me, that's dishonest. Anger, frustration & fear are the reasons people strike out at each other. Might as well own it and apologize for losing control, promise to do better, and move on.
When I've asked my adult children about their memories of being spanked, they say they don't recall anything particularly aweful or damaging. I was more prone to yell at them than hit them, anyway. Depending on what gets yelled at a kid, this form of violence can be more damaging in the long run than physical abuse.
Are you familiar with the work of the German psychologist Alice Miller? She's had a huge influence on my thinking about corporal punishment, humiliation & shaming, and children's rights.