Posted by CB on February 11, 2012 at 09:07:39
In Reply to: Re: I Hate God posted by IFT on February 11, 2012 at 05:49:47:
I regret if I gave you the impression that it's OK for me to do something and not for you. I just wanted to connect with you, and so I probed and poked and tried to figure out how to break through the wall of grief that separates and binds us.
My friend, who is wise beyond her years, would say that it is pure chance you came to this board and triggered my self-righteous anger. She would tell me I should be sensitive to the triggers that people raised in the cult have and that you gave me what I deserved. I would say there is a Higher Power at work and that there is healing for you and I--if not for her. I would also say to her, Now that you're slipping away from us, I feel more powerless and desperate than ever with regards to the evil done to TFI's children.
Shadows of forgotten ancestors: I saw my unconscious self shaking you until your teeth rattled, and I understood intuitively what had been done to you. But yet that behavior seemed to be the only way to show you that I care, because that is how people who "loved" you as a child made an emotional connection. That's how the abuse cycle works. The victim is also the victimizer. My friend understands this better than anyone I know.
In response to "I like it," the answer is yes and yes.