In Reply to: good subject and good comments posted by MG on July 15, 2004 at 04:47:10:
i agree. there are definite stages to the process, and often different for each individual. i read one writer compare it to the stages of grief. i think it's more complex then that even, but it did have similarities.
i think the process differs a lot between fg and sg, again w/ so much variation depending on individual exp in the cult, precult life, nuclear fam issues, and the type of support structure one has afterwards etc.
i do think one gets to a place where the need to vent lessens and the process of self examination can yield more useful wisdom for the trek forward.
getting educated on thought reform issues helps, and if possible talking w/ folks who "get it" and can help unlock the mysteries helps a lot.
i left 13 years ago. for the last 2+ yrs (on and off) i've been writing a book unravelling things from my own experience and the insights i've culled from others. 16 chapters so far ... so i may have overthought the issue a bit! ha!
i do think that some board activity might actually become detrimental at times, if it keeps one in a cycle of continually reliving the pain of trauma... like picking at a scab. ity can become a matter of defining oneself as a "victim" rather than helping one to regain fresh vision and confidence to move on. that may be where solid professional help might be useful when folks get stuck.
and then their is the whole spiritual thing...but that's about 16 chapters..