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Your Open Heart Prayer to the Lord! Maria #417 CM/FM 3163 12/97
To my dear, precious Family,
1. I know that many of you are fighting some very debilitating personal battles, and suffering terribly under the attacks of the Enemy. You might feel like your situation is hopeless, and that there's nothing you can do to gain the victory. But please be encouraged, because there is freedom, there is deliverance, there is a solution to the problems you face!
2.As I told you earlier, if you're jealous, possessive or selfish; if you're bitter or doubting or compromising; if you've lost your desire for the Word; if you no longer have a will to witness or be a missionary; if you can't get along with others, so that you have to live on your own; if you're lonely; if selfishness has crept into your life more and more; if you have difficulty showing the Lord's love to others; if you're toying with the idea of backsliding; if you've developed ungodly appetites, or unhealthy habits or addictions that are not of the Lord; if you battle negative thinking, or being critical of others or self-righteous; if you're constantly comparing or feeling discouraged, then you can apply the lessons I learned to these problems in your life and find the answers you need.
3.Because the Letter enumerating my lessons is very long and complex, I realized that it would take some time for you to digest it and apply those lessons to your own life and needs. But at the same time, I'm aware that the Spirit of the Lord falls very heavily upon you during the days of the Feast when you have time to read, reflect, and consider what the Lord wants to do in your life.
4.I wanted to take advantage of this time before you had to jump back into your normal busy schedules, so I asked the Lord to give a prayer that you could pray as your own heartcry. I asked for something that would be short, comparatively speaking, but that would encapsulate or summarize my lessons; something that would help you to apply my lessons to your personal situation and help you to take a definite step of faith and yieldedness.
5.It's extremely important for you to be able to live these lessons. It's not enough for you to understand them, but you also need to reach out to the Lord, make commitments, say the words and pray the prayers that will release His Heavenly forces and bring down His blessings and set you on the road to victory.
6.I like written prayers. There have been times when I've prepared personal written prayers in advance of praying them, because that enabled me to think and pray about what I wanted to say and the commitments I wanted to make to the Lord. I pray that this written prayer will help you to do just that.
7.Please take the time to read this and meditate on what it means to you. Then when you feel ready, you can pray this to the Lord and it will become your personal, heartfelt words to Him, your caring, loving Husband. Of course, you can modify it as you feel led. There are several places noted where you can fill in the details that are unique to your situation.
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8.Thank You, Jesus, my wonderful Friend, Lover and King, for these days of rest and refilling, as we've sat at Your feet to celebrate not only Dad's birthday and the birthday of the Family, but also our second anniversary of being Your intimate brides. Thank You for Your Words. We are so rich in truth, so blessed, as we are privileged to sit down and enjoy such a delicious, abundant banquet that You have set before us. You've prepared a table before us in the presence of our enemies. You've kept us and protected us and supplied our every need. You've held us close to Your breast and comforted us and shown us the way wherein we are to walk. We really appreciate all You've done and are doing and will do for us!
9.Thank You, Jesus, for the important lessons You've brought out at this time for the Family as a whole, and especially for me personally. Thank You particularly for Mama's lessons, for her willingness to open her heart and life to give us a glimpse of her innermost thoughts and feelings, the battles she fought, the tests and temptations she endured, and the wonderful victory You brought through Your miracle-working power.
10.As always, this time of the Birthday Feast celebration is a time of challenge and of moving forward as a body. But it is also a time when I personally, my dear sweet Jesus, want to take the time to review my life, my attitudes, my long-standing NWOs, the things I've been holding back from You or have been hesitant to forsake. Even though it hurts, even though it's uncomfortable, I want to take a long, hard look at the way I live, the way I think, the way I interact with others. How closely am I following You? Am I pleasing You? Am I believing, receiving and obeying the New Wine? What can I personally do to overcome the roadblocks to unity in my own life and in my Home? Show me where I stand concerning jealousy, the care of our single moms, living Acts 2:44 and 45, sexual freedom, living and understanding the Law of Love, being open to shepherding, overcoming the generation gap, resisting the dangers of compromise, and absorbing the Word, the New Wine in particular.
11.I want You to take the spotlight of Your Word and shine it deep within my soul, and clearly bring to mind now the areas in which I need to change. I do sincerely, with all my heart, want to change, Jesus. I want to be a new creature. I want to be made anew. I want a fresh start.
12.Being a part of the Family, part of Your revolutionary Endtime army, is a privilege and an honor, and I thank You with all my heart that I've been able, by Your grace, to hold on day after day, year after year; that You've given me the strength to make it through the many revolutions that have come our way. So many times we've been tested with strong meat, with radical messages, with bottle-breaking news from You or Dad or Mama, and You've given me the grace to take it, to believe, and to hold on to my crown. I thank You for that, Jesus, because there's nothing more important to me than serving You, loving You, and having You in first place in my life.
13.But I know that there are areas I could do so much better in and be a better sample and more what You want me to be. I know that I've been unyielded, stubborn, rebellious, selfish and unloving in many ways. In the past it seems You winked at these failures, or at least You tolerated them. But now, Lord, I know that I'm accountable for these lessons that Mama has shared and this challenge that You've put forth. I realize that I need to grasp the spiritual principles and be mature enough to apply them to my life. I need to be hungry spiritually, to have a strong desire to be right with You, and get desperate to make the changes You want me to make.
14.I understand that as we draw nearer to the End, You expect and need for us to be more unified, more dedicated, more sacrificial, more loving. You're preparing Your Endtime army, and I want to be a part of that army. I don't want to miss out or lose my crown and fall by the wayside because of my own laziness, indifference, lethargy, selfishness, jealousy, lack of love, or unyieldedness. I want You and Your love and Spirit to reign supreme in my life. I want to get right with You and forsake anything that's not of You.
15.I value the high calling of being in the Family, being Your intimate bride, Your messenger, an example of Your love and Words more than anything. But I know that this calling comes with a high cost, and by Your grace, Jesus, I'm prepared to pay that price, come what may. You gave Your all for me, and I should be willing to do the same--to lay down my life daily in loving service for You and others.
16.Jesus, I don't want to read Your Word just for information or entertainment, or from a philosophical or even educational point of view. I want Your Words, these messages from You and Dad and Mama, to enter deep into my heart and to bring about a change. I want to live the Word. I want to be soft, moldable clay in Your hands, so that the Word will motivate me and bring about a revolution, a metanoia, something tangible and lasting that I can see and feel, and that will be a testimony to others.
17.I know that You can do miracles, Lord. You can change my heart, my mind, my desires, and my very nature, if I'll just give it all to You. I need Your miracle-working power, Jesus. And as I pray this prayer, I do, by Your grace, give You my all.
18.It's hard for me to have the faith that I can really change, that I can get the victory over these long-term, besetting sins that have been such a problem for me for so long. I often feel so dirty, so sinful, so icky and awful. I don't feel worthy of Your miracles. I don't feel that I deserve for You to reach down and touch me with Your miracle-working power and deliver me.
19.It seems this battle has gone on so long. I've made some progress now and then, and sometimes I've done better for a little while, but then I've slipped back into my same old problems again, to the point that it often just seems hopeless, that there's nothing I can do. Then I feel the horrible weight of the condemnation of the Enemy, because I know that what I do, my ______________________ , is not of You. (Note: You can fill in the blank above as you feel led, such as: bitterness, self-righteousness, negative thinking, unloving behavior and interaction with others, jealousy, selfishness and possessiveness, resistance to the New Wine, doubts and lack of faith, criticalness, fear, rigid old-bottle inflexibility, lack of patience and compassion and understanding with others, laziness and unwillingness to witness, angry spirit, ungodly addiction to System music or movies, etc.)
20.In spite of my sins and shortcomings, I know that You are my constant Friend, Companion, Lover and Husband, and that You are always there for me; that You love me with an everlasting love. You never let me go or forsake me or turn Your back on me no matter how undeserving or horrible and sinful I feel. As I pray this prayer I claim the verse that it's not because of or through any works of righteousness which I have done that You save me or deliver me, but it's by Your mercy.
21.In some ways I've been partially yielded, as Mama was at one point in time. As You know, it's the desire of my heart to please You and obey You, and I do want to live the Word and be close to You and be a good testimony to others. I want my life to be fruitful. I want to be loving, I want to be a blessing to my loved ones and to lift up those who are weaker or in need. I want to obey the New Wine and the Charter. I want to be part of the Endtime army, the avant-garde, so I have tried to yield, even though I know that in some ways that yieldedness has only been partial yieldedness.
22.I thank You, Jesus, for giving me the grace and the strength to hold on through my battles, even though You know I haven't been fully yielded. Thank You also for giving others the grace to put up with me, to live with me, to love me in spite of my weaknesses, even though it's probably been obvious to them, too, that I haven't been fully yielded. Thank You for them and their prayers.
23.But now, Lord, I want to get past this problem of partial yieldedness, of fighting and resisting what You're doing and the direction You're leading in the Spirit. I want with all my heart to be completely yielded, one hundred percent Yours, with nothing held back. I want to be Yours and Yours alone, totally submitted to Your will--a happy, yielded, humble bride, who lives to please You and others and not myself.
24.I want Mama's open heart prayer to be my prayer. You said, Jesus, that we could take the spiritual principles in Mama's lessons and apply them to our own lives, regardless of what our problem is. You made it clear that You allowed her to experience those battles and that severe testing so that we could learn and we could follow in her footsteps and become better fighters, we could partake of her lessons of acceptance, yieldedness and desperate prayer; and that's what I want to do right now.
25.Praying this prayer really costs me. It's a test. In one way I really want to pray it, but in another way I don't. It kind of scares me. I'm a little bit afraid that I won't have what it takes to change or to yield or to make the sacrifices that I know You want me to make. It's like Dad says, "When you pray a prayer like this, you know that things will never be the same again, because you give permission for the Lord to move forward, to work in your heart and mind and change your life."
26.I know You want me to pray this prayer. I need to, but I can hardly muster up the courage or the conviction, because I know that praying this prayer means that my life is going to change, and I'm going to have to change, and it will require yieldedness, forsaking all, and becoming a new creature in some way.
27.I can tell that my pride is resisting. My fear of the future and my preconceived ideas about the way I think things ought to be, or even the way I see myself, are trying to hold me back, along with my selfishness, my wanting things my own way, my lack of faith and trust in You--and, yes, even my hope that if I hold out long enough and don't pray this prayer, that maybe things will change in some way, and You won't require such a sacrifice of me, such a laying down of myself and my pride and my own ideas, such a total yielding. But I'm going to raise a standard against all those things that would hold me back right now. I'm going to rebuke the Enemy. I resist you, Satan! I rebuke you, in Jesus' name! Get behind me and have no part in me!
28.I'm determined to pray this prayer, Lord, because I need a change. I want to cast myself, my cares, my hopes, my dreams, my loved ones, my future on You! I want You to transform me into what You want me to be.
29.I need something supernatural. I can't do it, and if there's any hope for me, Lord, I know it has to be You. Like Mama, I've come to the end of my rope. I'm tired of fighting these battles. I'm tired of being the way I am. I'm tired of standing in the way of You being able to perform Your perfect plan. I want to be completely yielded.
30.Jesus, please somehow change my heart.Give me a miracle! It has to be a miracle. For me to get the victory over my long-term problems is an impossible situation, but You said You're the God of the impossible, and what's impossible with man is possible with You, and all things are possible to him that believeth. I need the faith even to believe that this change is possible, Lord. But You said it, so I know that whatsoever we ask in faith, believing, You will do.
31.I don't know how You're going to pull this off, Lord, but please, could You? I really, really want it. I mean, in a way I don't want it, because I know it's going to cost me. I'll have to change, forsake all, and humble myself. But on the other hand, I really want it because I know that's what You want. I know that's what's going to be pleasing to You. I know that's where Your blessing lies.
32.I want to get rid of what's not of You, Lord. I know that no matter what sacrifice I make, no matter how much I have to give, no matter what it looks like I'm losing, I will still have You! It's just such a wonderful feeling to know I'm not going to fall, because You're going to be there to lift me up, to hold me in Your arms. So I don't have anything to fear, and I'm getting more faith all the time. I'm so thankful, because You're giving it to me, Lord. The prayers of my loved ones are strengthening me, and Dad's helping me, and I think probably a lot of people up There are as well, so I'm excited about it.
33.Oh, I know there are going to be a lot of tests and I'll be tempted to go back on what I said, but by Your grace, Lord, I'm going to keep going. I have to keep going for Your sake, for the sake of my loved ones and the Family. So I pledge, I vow before You, Lord, and before Dad and all of Heaven, that I'm going to keep going. I'm going to obey and give and change, no matter what it takes!
34.I know You're counting on me and I've got to go forward.And if I'm going to have to do this, why not do it wholeheartedly?Why not go all the way? Instead of being dragged along with the move of Your Spirit unwillingly, reluctantly and hesitantly, why not give it all I've got? I know the sooner I yield, the quicker the victory can come--the victory that You want--the breaking down of the roadblocks to unity, the binding of us all together and helping us to love one another, the victory of being strengthened in my long-standing problems, and making me giving and sacrificial and all the things that are like You and what You want me to be.
35.Lord, You said, "It takes great faith to be specific in your prayer requests. When I hear from your lips exactly what you want and you verbalize specifically the changes that you would like to see, and you couple this with great yieldedness and submission, then it draws from Me the power to grant your requests. As you know, according to your faith it will be done unto you, but also according to your requests it will be done unto you."
36. I want to be specific with You now. What I want You to do is this (Please enumerate here in your own words the specific changes you want the Lord to bring about in your life:)
37.Jesus, I know all things are possible to him that believeth. With man it is impossible, but with God all things are possible. You specialize in things thought impossible, and Dad says that You can do through us and with us and in us what no man can do. Doing miracles is Your specialty. Not only are You our Husband, our Lover, our King and Savior, but You're our Miracle-worker too.
38. You taught us, through Dad's message to Mama, that as soon as we pray a sincere, wholehearted, desperate prayer of yieldedness, that prayer sets things in motion in the spirit world. It releases Heavenly forces to come to our aid, to work in our heart and mind, to calm our spirit and strengthen us in our weak areas. We know the spiritual warfare depends on us; it depends on our choices. By faith, Lord, by praying this prayer, I have made a choice and I have yielded. I've put my yieldedness into words and action. I've stepped out on the water, and I'm trusting You to hold me up, to carry me to the other side and to set my feet upon a strong, solid victory.
39.Please, Lord, loose the power of the Heavenlies to come to my aid! Raise up the angelic forces to support me and strengthen me! Turn the tide of the battle!
40.Dad says that our prayers equal yieldedness, and when we're yielded, that You will do anything for us. Over and over again You and Dad and Mama have emphasized the importance and the power of yieldedness. That's what You're looking for in all of us. That's what You're looking for in me--yieldedness. That's the key to victory, not just over jealousy and possessiveness, but over other ongoing spiritual battles as well, such as selfishness, independence, bitterness, not being able to get along with others, resistance to the New Wine, doubts, worldliness, a fascination for evil, a lack of conviction--all of these problems, sins and NWOs that hold us back.
41.Dad said that we just don't understand the power and value of yieldedness. Once we've yielded, then the change has been made in our spirit. The laying down of ourselves, our pride, our willfulness, our determination to have it our own way, brings a change in our spirit and a change in the spirit world as well. We're then able to avail ourselves of not only Your power, but also the power of the ministering spirits that You will release to help and strengthen us. We will then find it easier to resist the Enemy's lies and temptations to fall back into our old reactions, old ways of seeing things, old ways of relating to people and circumstances.
42.Our yieldedness not only brings a change in us, in our spirit, but it brings a change in the spirit world. Our choices affect the spiritual battles being waged. Our choices, meaning our yieldedness, affect the power the Enemy has to cause us trouble.
43.Of course, even after yielding we can still have battles,but the yieldedness is what gives us power to fight those battles. It gives us power to progress. So after yielding, with each battle we become stronger, and the power of the Enemy to influence our thoughts and actions is weakened. It's the yieldedness that brings Your power into our life to progress. And slowly but surely, through the battles that we face after our moment of yieldedness and our laying our all on the altar, we become stronger. But there's a definite change in our heart and mind and spirit, and in the battle going on in the spirit world, in the moment that we yield.
44.Lord, the Enemy has really been fighting me. Sometimes I feel like there's a war going on in my head, with the thoughts I think, the reactions I have. I hear Your still, small voice and the voice of Your Word encouraging me to do the right thing, and I know how I should be thinking or reacting, but then the Enemy comes in with his barrage of lies, doubts, and critical, bitter thoughts, and often it's more than I can resist. I just yield to him and then I fall back into that horrible, vicious cycle that causes me and others so much heartache, discouragement and frustration! What a waste of time! What a distraction! I know my yielding to the Enemy is wrong, but I just haven't had the strength to fight him. But I claim the promise that my yieldedness would cause a change not only in my spirit, but in the spirit world as well.
45.Please, Lord, according to these spiritual principles that Dad revealed to us, I ask that You reduce, minimize, or limit in some way the Enemy's power to attack me. I don't want him to influence my thoughts and actions any more! Please give me supernatural grace to fight! Make me more of a fighter! Help me to even learn to enjoy the battle!
46.Jesus, You said that You arewell able to help me rise above the natural circumstances, no matter how impossible they may seem to me. You said that when I have no will of my own and I sign a blank sheet and humbly submit that sheet to You for You to fill in, then my desires and Your desires are in unison. Dad says that when that happens, that's a picture of yieldedness, and that it's that kind of yieldedness that gets the reward.
47.I know You can give me my heart's desires, Lord, if I continually yield and want this miracle. It's within Your power to give it to me--and not only within Your power, but within Your great desire, because You love me.
48.Please, Lord, let my yieldedness and desperation pull down miracles from Heaven. Take away my stony, selfish heart and replace it with a heart of love and giving. Calm the troubled waters and make my heart serene. Break the chains of selfishness, jealousy, bitterness, lack of love, and set me free from these things, as well as the problems I listed above. You said my yieldedness and desire and desperation are the keys that enable You to unlock these chains, to remove the shackles, and that I don't have to wait for the future, but at the voice of my cry You will answer me. Please, Lord, please do it!
49.Jesus, I don't like having all these fears and apprehensions, all this tension and nervousness that my unyieldedness brings. But You said that once I give to the limit, then I'll have nothing else to fear; that once I've given all and I'm not holding on to anything or holding back in any way, that the result of such giving will be freedom. Lord, I do want You to set me free--free from the past, free from the fears of the future, and free from this bondage of unyieldedness. I want the freedom of Your Spirit. I want the happiness that comes with total submission. I want to know that I've given all, that I belong to You one hundred percent, that there isn't any Huddersfield in my heart that the Enemy can claim as his.
50.I know time is short and You're trying to shake us up to the urgency of all that there is to do and the great need for us to be full of Your Spirit and Your power and Your Word. You promised, Lord, that as we grow closer and closer to the Last Days, that we'd be able to win victories and see miracles and have overcoming faith, and that these things would be given to us more quickly. We'll need these personal victories desperately in order to stay closely knit and united. I do want to be a fit, strong, well-prepared soldier. I want to be ready to fight the Enemy, to go where You want me to go and do whatever You want me to do. I want to be what You want me to be, so that I can be as effective and fruitful as possible for You and for Dad and Mama and Peter and the Family.
51.You said, Lord, that You would give us these miracles, not only because we need them, but also because You love us and You want to make it easy for us. I know that I'm still going to have to fight. I know that even after praying this prayer and laying my all on the altar of sacrifice and asking You to make me a yielded vessel in the hand of the potter, I'll still have to fight. There will be tests and temptations. There will even be times when I'll fall. But by Your grace, Lord, I'll rise up again and again, like a strong man who falls seven times but rises up again.
52.I know the Enemy will try to discourage me and steal away my victories. But like Dad said, if I keep fighting, it will get easier and easier, and the battles will be less and less frequent, and less and less severe, until finally they will have almost faded away completely and I'll have a strong, solid victory and testimony!
53.This challenge is a wonderful blessing in disguise. And if I recognize it as such, and I take up the challenge and I make it something positive and really put my whole heart into it, it's going to be a lot easier. Because then I'm going to be in cooperation with You, Lord, and in cooperation with my Heavenly helpers. I'm not going to be fighting against them; I'm going to be fighting along with them.
54.Well, I know all of this sounds great and sounds real brave and courageous. But I probably won't always be sounding this way, so for the record I want to know that today, on __________________________ (add date) I determined by faith that this is what my goal is, this is what my aim is, and this is what I'm going to do, by Your grace.
55.Thank You, Jesus, my wonderful Lover, Husband, and King! I'm trusting You completely and I know You love me and You do all things well. I'm leaning on You. I'm expecting miracles from You, from Your power, from Your Spirit, because of Your promises. I know that I'm nothing. I know that in me dwells no good thing, and I'm completely convinced that I don't have the strength or the power or the determination to change myself. I've tried again and again, and I've only failed. But I do believe Your Word and Your promises, and I know that as You love Mama and You were willing to work in her life and honor her prayers and deliver her and give her victory and freedom and power over the Enemy, You also love me and are willing to do the same for me.
56.I need You so desperately, Jesus. I love You, I want You, I desire You. I want Your love and power to lead and guide Me each step of the way, in everything I do and say, and in all my interactions with others. I want to be a sample of Your love to the brethren and to outsiders--to my friends, my shepherds, the ones I'm close to, the people I witness to.
57.When people look at me, I want them to see You. I'm reminded of Peter and John, who were unlearned and weak, simple men, but people knew that they had been with You, Jesus. When all is said and done and I've finished my course and You call me Home, I want it to be said of me that people knew that I had been with You, because they saw You reflected in me--Your love, Your mercy, Your compassion, Your understanding, Your strength and power.
58.I want You to live and work and move in me as never before. I want to be a new creature. I want to be Yours in body, soul, and spirit. I want to learn to live the Heavenly life and partake of the freedoms of Heaven here and now. I want to be free from the shackles of pride, jealousy and envy, selfishness, bitterness, criticalness, and unyieldedness. I want to be so filled with Your love--love for You and love for others--that it will overflow and extinguish the fires of disunity.
59.Jesus, even if I don't see an answer right away, even if I don't see or feel the manifestation of this miracle for some time, I will keep on believing, because You have promised, and I know You won't fail me. I'm determined to continue to be yielded. By Your grace, Lord, I am resolute in my desire to be unselfish, loving, open, giving, considerate of others, obedient to Your Word, and eager to read, receive and live the New Wine.
60.I want to renew my commitment to You, Jesus, to love You more fervently and more frequently and more intimately as Your bride. I want to spend more time in Your presence--lying in Your arms, communing with You, pouring out my heart to You and hearing Your personal, specific Words to me, those that are tailor-made for my individual situation. I want You to be that stable force that I can hold on to and know that everything is okay. And when I feel the need, I will do my best to come back to You in desperate prayer, to call out to You for the strength to keep fighting and resisting the Enemy!
61.Lord, when Mama asked You what kind of victory You had given her, what You had done in her life, You said: "The victory is yours forever and ever, and the Enemy cannot take it away from you! Your yieldedness and desperation will guarantee your victory. Your yieldedness to My Spirit and to My will is your protection against any weakness in your victory. For as you continue to look to Me, to yield to Me and be desperate, your victory will only grow and grow, and become stronger and stronger. … Don't worry, My love, for even though you might experience some tests along the way, your victory is yours and it is guaranteed to you by your yieldedness."
62.By faith, Jesus, I claim these promises as my own. Mama said, and I believe, that what You've done for her, You're able to do for me. So by Your grace, I'm determined to do my part to be willing, yielded and obedient, and I'm trusting You, my wonderful, caring Husband and Lover, my Miracle-worker, to do the rest.
63.I love You and need You, precious Jesus, for ever and ever. I will try to always stay by Your side, and am forever thankful to be part of the revolutionary Endtime army of the children of David. Thank You Jesus! Hallelujah! Amen.
64.Now, Lord, I ask You to speak to me and give me Your loving, comforting Words of personal encouragement. Please give me promises of Your mighty power and the victories that are to come that I can hold on to. Thank You Jesus! (End of Open Heart Prayer.)
65.(Mama:) If you don't have the gift of prophecy or feel hesitant to practice it, then you can ask someone else to receive a message from the Lord for you. But please remember that the Lord gave me the gift of prophecy to help me through my time of difficult battles, which was a great source of encouragement to me. I believe He can do the same for you, my dear Family, if you'll just have faith to reach out and receive it.
66.God bless and keep you accepting, yielded, desperate and fighting! I love you so much and admire your faith and determination in being willing to wholeheartedly pray this prayer. The Lord won't fail you! You will see miracles!
With much love and prayers,
Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family