The Family / Children of God

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PREGNANCY AND CHILDBIRTH

5 Ways to Look Great During Pregnancy
By Terri Isidro-Cloudas, American Baby Web site
       Try these tips to help you look your best during every trimester of your pregnancy.
       Keep It Simple: Don't over-accessorize, or overdo your outfits when you're pregnant-the focus should be on your radiant glow! Stick to clean, simple lines and classic cuts. Don't wear large or busy patterns that overwhelm your curvy frame. Instead, opt for solid colors and add a patterned scarf or fun jewelry for interest.
       Accentuate the Positive: One of the best side effects of pregnancy is an accentuated-or for some women a newfound-voluptuousness. Dare to wear a slightly lower neckline than usual, or a blouse that clings. Take pride in your beautiful pregnant body.
       Hair Revolution: Try a new hairstyle to go with your new body. Experiment with fun upsweeps, braiding, combs, and hair clips.
       The Power of Posture: With all the changes in weight and gravity your body is going through, you may develop a bit of a slouch as your pregnancy progresses. Avoid the tendency to push your hips far forward and slouch your shoulders, or to stick your belly out and throw your shoulders back as you walk. These postures can cause back strain. Instead, keep your hips and shoulders in line as you walk, and keep your back straight by tucking a pillow behind you when you sit.
       Nurture the Radiance: Moisturize daily and gently exfoliate* your skin once or twice a week to keep your skin glowing, and smooth. Protect your skin now more than ever from the sun's harmful rays by using a gentle sunscreen on your face and all exposed body parts whenever you'll be exposed to the sun.

       * Exfoliation means clearing the epidermis (outer layer of skin) of dead cells, rejuvenating the skin and allowing it to breathe better. This can reduce blackheads and help skin care products to work better.

[BOX]
       (Dad speaking:) Start now telling those mommies and those who are pregnant how beautiful they are, how gorgeous they are, how sexy they are! Our pregnant women and mothers deserve your appreciation and your words of love telling them they're beautiful, they're gorgeous, they're marvelous, they're irresistible, they're indescribably ravishing women who glow with the Lord's love! I know, boys, it might break your bottle to say this to your wife who may be pregnant with number eight, and whose beauty varies from the young women! But let me tell you, she's got that extra shine, that special beauty, that additional glow that gets brighter and brighter with every child she bears. Because of her years of yieldedness in fulfilling her purpose as one of the Lord's queen mothers, her true lasting beauty shines all the brighter! ("Living the Lord's Law of Love!-Pt.9," ML #3209:76)
[END OF BOX]

Eating Well Before and During Pregnancy
From Lamb, Europe
       A number of years ago, I became pregnant for the first time at age 37. I was totally unprepared, never imagining it would happen to me at that late time! I wasn't the least bit into health supplements; though I ate my meals, I ran on strong coffee and maybe grabbed a handful of peanuts here and there for snacks if I had time. When I first got pregnant I was extremely nauseous and sick for the first few weeks. It was a fight to stay somewhat productive. However the second time around, four years later, I didn't experience the same nausea.
       When I prayed about it, the Lord showed me that through having to "get healthy" in having and nursing a baby, I developed more healthy eating habits.-Nothing super fancy, just simple things like eating yogurt regularly with a big dollop of molasses; taking brewer's yeast and wheat germ in salads, saucy meals and on popcorn; sprinkling pumpkin and sunflower seeds on salads.
       These are things I never would have thought of doing before getting pregnant. However, from my generally eating better since my first baby, and continuing on with the same healthy habits where and when I could, I think my body built up a reservoir of the different vitamins that are so needed in pregnancy.
       Another plus is that I've been taking a good natural multivitamin for the last few months, and I believe these contributed to this early stage of pregnancy being tons easier than the first one.
       All that to say, it pays not to avoid or ignore taking vitamin (or natural) supplements and eating as well as you can where and when possible, especially if there is any possibility of becoming pregnant. It makes things so much easier and more pleasant when you get pregnant, and you'll be thankful in the end!

Pregnancy Changes
AP
       When a woman is pregnant, she experiences a wide range of changes in her body, some of which may affect her skin. Here are some of the most common skin conditions that women should be aware of.
       * Midway through the pregnancy, a woman may start to see a dark line forming between the pubic bone and the bellybutton.
       * The nipple and areola, the area around the nipple, can become darker.
       * The skin on the face may darken.
       * Moles may darken.
       * Hair may thicken, as the follicles' normal cycle is disrupted and less hair is lost.
       After delivery, the cycle changes and there may be more hair loss.
       * Nails may also change; they may grow more quickly, but can be brittle or weak.
       * There are several rashes that can occur. The most common rash, PUPPP (pruritic urticarial papules and plaques of pregnancy), is seen in about 1 out of 200 pregnancies. Although this hive-like, red bumpy rash can be uncomfortably itchy for moms-to-be, it does not affect the baby.
       PUPPP is most often found in the stretch marks on the abdomen, the breasts or other areas of the body that get stretched out during pregnancy. It usually begins late in the pregnancy, after the 35th week.
       * Pemphigoid gestationis is another rash that doesn't affect the growing fetus. It occurs much less frequently than PUPPP. It can start as persistent hive-like patches with red raised areas; unlike PUPPP, however, it can also consist of large blisters. Pemphigoid gestationis usually occurs in the second trimester, flares up after delivery, and can recur in subsequent pregnancies.
       * Pyogenic granuloma (also known as pregnancy tumors), occurs most frequently in the gums or on the fingers. It may look like a small red growth. Although it is not dangerous, it can be a nuisance because it bleeds easily.
       * Other skin growths can occur during pregnancy; for example, some women develop skin tags-soft, small, flesh-colored hanging pieces of flesh.
       (Jesus speaking:) If you discover something on your skin that's strange and unusual during pregnancy, don't automatically worry or be fearful. Some of these skin problems are very rare, and when they do occur occasionally, you can be relieved to know that they usually subside after pregnancy. Even these more rare skin rashes or abnormalities that may sound alarming are very minor in the great scheme of things-and it's a small inconvenience to endure considering the beautiful gift I'm forming within you. Your body goes through a lot of physical and hormonal changes during pregnancy, so it shouldn't surprise you that you might experience some of these somewhat unpleasant or bothersome side effects. But you can trust Me and know that I will keep you througheach change your body experiences. If you notice something out of the ordinary, ask Me about it. I can tell you what it is, how long it will last, what physical steps to take, and how to rise above it. (End of message.)

Baby Care in Extreme Conditions
From Rose T., Turkey
       This is a response to the article "Woe?" ("Issues, Part 13," ML #3430:25-34) about being a nursing or PG mom during the Tribulation. Maybe some people have read my story in CCHB1, "How to Survive a War with a Baby." I just wanted to testify again that although it can be a bit tougher for those with little kids, things worked out, and my baby was actually an asset.
       When our town was being bombed in Cyprus and we had to flee with not much more than the clothes on our backs, the first night we slept in a farmhouse with about 50 other refugees. We were given the only available bed, because I had a baby. Everyone else slept sardine-style on the floor. When we got to the refugee camp, it was very difficult the first day or two. I was hardly sleeping, sharing a little army cot with the baby, and I couldn't go to the dining room to eat as it was so noisy that my daughter would get frightened and cry. But things did get better. In the end, my cute baby made many friends for us, and we never lacked for anything.
       Then, traveling by boat to a new country where we didn't know anyone-the five of us had only $10 between us all! That was barely enough (in those days) for a cheap hotel for one night.
       But our cute blonde baby attracted the attention of one of the ship's stewards, who invited us to stay at his house for a few days. Then we traveled by bus to the next city-this time with only $1 left-and again our baby helped us make friends, and we got invited to someone's home again, this time to a pretty nice house!
       So all in all, I would say my baby was an asset! Having her also encouraged my own faith, as I felt like such a sinner at the time that I didn't feel "worthy" of the Lord saving me or doing the miracles we needed in that situation.-But I knew He wouldn't fail an innocent little baby!
       And when I was pregnant with this baby, I went through a major political revolution in another country, and got caught in demonstrations and tear gas-but I was okay! Thank the Lord.

[BOX]
       (Jesus speaking:) Whether you're pregnant, or have a small baby, or a huge family, or whatever, I can use it all for My glory, and can even help it be a bigger blessing for you in that time of trial. … Where the difficulties are, that's where I will be, to bestow an extra special helping of My power and My grace. ("Issues, Part 13," ML #3430:32,34)
[END OF BOX]

His Family Planning
From Angela Victory (of Daniel), Romania
       The GN "Gems and Jewels, Part 1" (ML #3416) was beautiful. I wanted to comment on the section "Going for the Gold?" as it was so encouraging.
       After our second daughter, Leiana, was born, we asked the Lord to give us a two-year break so our children could grow up a little, and He told us that He would grant us our desire. We trusted Him, and just after we celebrated Leiana's second birthday, I found out that I was pregnant with our third. I was amazed at how the Lord kept His promise and gave us our desire. It encouraged my faith that He's in perfect control. He works together with us, considering our desires, burdens and level of faith, and doesn't give us more than we can take.
       Both our girls were born on Easter Sunday, two years apart, and many people commented that we couldn't have planned it better even if we had wanted to. Thank the Lord for His planning.

[BOX]
       Babies are eternal gifts we are training, not just for time, but for eternity! God is the Creator of pregnancy, not just merely some man loving a woman. He created those children, not you. You were merely the human instruments that God used. (MOP 98:32)
[END OF BOX]

FROM HEAVEN'S DOORS

A Loving Jesus Birth
From Shine (of Tim), USA
       I recently gave birth to a beautiful baby girl. As my due date approached I brought it before the Lord, asking Him what I should do to prepare for the delivery. He told me I should do as He had instructed in my last pregnancies: Memorize and review verses and quotes on faith, have plenty of Word time, etc. But this time there was also something new!-He told me that this was going to be a "loving Jesus birth." Now that sounded really funny to me! I couldn't picture myself loving the Lord intimately while going through labor. I sometimes even have a difficult time remembering to practice loving Jesus on regular days!
       Well, I went into the very beginning stages of labor one night after putting the kids to bed. Eventually my husband and I went to bed, as I thought I would be able to sleep. He sweetly told me to wake him up as soon as I needed him, but I wanted to let him rest as I knew it would be a while. The contractions were strong enough that I couldn't sleep, yet mild enough that I could lie there, relaxed, praising our sweet Husband and really loving Him.
       As the morning approached my contractions got stronger, and at about 6 AM Tim and I went for a walk by the beautiful trees by our Home. I felt so much peace, and knew that the Lord was holding me in His arms.
       Soon the labor progressed, and my contractions got very strong. I was a bit tired due to not sleeping the night before. My midwife came and said that I wasn't ready yet, even though I felt I was. The baby was in posterior position, and one side of my cervix was not moving back properly, which is a problem I've had in all of my births. So labor got quite intense for me.
       It was so neat, though, because every time I'd start to feel even a little overwhelmed, the words and tunes of some of my favorite loving Jesus songs would start flooding through my mind loud and clear. I could feel Jesus holding me in the most difficult moments.
       Then it took a lot of pushing to get her out, since she was posterior and also very big. I felt low in strength, and I had to push longer and harder than with any of my other babies. Again, the answer for me was focusing on our Husband's beautiful, endearing love. My midwife was telling me to push, and sweet Tim was so encouraging and loving as he always is, but at certain moments I just felt inside like I couldn't handle it. So I would tell the Lord how much I loved Him, and say, "I don't have the strength to do this, so it has to be Your strength, sweet Jesus."
       Then again I would hear my favorite loving Jesus songs running through my head, the words becoming more real to me than ever. It was amazing, because though I was tired and my body was working hard, in my mind and heart there was complete peace; I knew Jesus was so close to me.

Natural Is Best
From Sarah, Japan
       I recently gave birth to our 8th child, Natalie Elizabeth. In my last few months of pregnancy, I had different problems: unprocessed sugar in my body, feeling weak and fatigued and having to lie down after each meal, etc. As it was my eighth, the doctors were concerned about my situation and suggested inducing the labor early, so the baby wouldn't be too big. (Babies can grow to be too large when the mother has unprocessed sugar in her body.)
       However, I explained that I wanted to have my baby naturally if at all possible, and they suggested a certain diet to improve my condition. So I started eating six meals a day instead of three, just eating half as much each time.-If you take small portions of food, it is easier for your body to digest it without leaving the sugar unprocessed. I cut down on my intake of sugar, oily foods, salty foods, and red meat, and ate lots of veggies and high-protein foods such as fish, chicken, tofu, natto (Japanese bean dish), etc.
       After using this diet for one week, the sugar was completely gone from my urine. Gradually my varicose veins improved, and I was feeling much better! I was claiming the keys and praying desperately for a safe and easy delivery in His time, too. The Lord was faithful to answer prayer and I had an easy, quick and natural delivery! PTL!

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CULINARY DELIGHTS

[BOX]
       (Eve:) While not all of these foods listed in this feature will be available where you are, we pray that it will be helpful and informative regarding the food items that are common in your part of the world. We pray that it will give you a good idea of many of the nutrients that our wonderful Creator has packed into the food He supplies for us, and help us strive for a good balance and variety!
[END OF BOX]

Healing Foods for Optimum Nutrition
Excerpts from the book by nutritional therapist Denise Mortimore
       The human body needs over 50 essential nutrients (vitamins, minerals, amino acids, fatty acids) each day, and by making the most of our diet, we can achieve youthful skin, clear thinking, and a strong, vibrant body.
       Research confirms that many colors in fresh foods are related to a wide range of health-giving substances. The phytochemicals which give food their color are lycopene (red), betacarotene (orange), curcumin (yellow), chlorophyll (green), and anthocyanidins (purple). By incorporating a broad "color mixture" of unprocessed foods into your diet, you can ensure that your body receives the best raw materials to keep it healthy.

Health Benefits of Green Vegetables
       * Reduced risk of heart disease, stroke, high blood pressure, cataracts, anemia, spina bifida, cancers, and osteoporosis.
       * Helping detoxify the liver, and improve bile flow.
       * Helping symptoms of post-menstrual stress and menopause.
       * Cleansing of the blood and maintenance of blood vessels.
       * Soothing the digestive tract.
       Green vegetables contain chlorophyll, betacarotene, and flavonoids. Chlorophyll provides magnesium and vitamin K, both vital for healthy red blood cells. Betacarotene is an antioxidant, which helps the immune system, helps prevent cancers, and aids performance in cognitive tests. Flavonoids are vital for healthy blood vessels.
       Parsley, spinach, watercress, salad vegetables, and beet greens are rich in chlorophyll, carotenes, and flavonoids, as well as being a good source of calcium, iron, and vitamin C. Parsley can reduce the risks of some cancers. Green peppers, rich in vitamin C, can reduce the risk of heart attacks and strokes.
       Asparagus is rich in protein, vitamins C and B2, folic acid, and potassium. It is a sedative and diuretic, and is used to treat stress, indigestion, arthritis, and rheumatism.
       Artichokes are low in calories and contain a starch called inulin, which aids blood-sugar balance, and active ingredients that improve bile flow and protect the liver.
       The skin of cucumbers contains silica, which is good for skeletal tissues and the complexion.
       Dandelion greens increase the nutrient content of a salad, and are rich in betacarotene. The roots contain compounds that aid liver function, promote weight loss, support diuretic activity, and cleanse the blood. Dandelion coffee is made from the roasted roots. (See Eve #37, pg.21, for more on Dandelion.)
       Brassicas-broccoli, Brussels sprouts, cabbage, kale, cauliflower, kohlrabi (a descendant of the wild cabbage), mustard greens, spring greens, Swedish turnips (or rutabagas), turnips, horseradish, mustard, and cress-have good levels of betacarotene, flavornoids, vitamins C, E and K, calcium, iron, magnesium, boron, potassium, fiber, and chlorophyll. Eating cabbage three times a week can reduce your risk of colon cancer by 60%. Broccoli and Brussels sprouts are particularly active against breast cancer. Brassicus can increase liver detoxification and destroy harmful bacteria, such as Salmonella. Cabbage and cabbage water are excellent for soothing the digestive lining and stimulating the liver.

Cautions:
       * Peppers, chili peppers, aubergine, tomatoes, and potatoes may aggravate arthritic symptoms in some people.
       * For people with thyroid problems, "goitrogens" in brassicas interfere with iodine absorption. These are inactivated by cooking.

Health Benefits of Carrots and Carotene Vegetables
       * Reduced risk of listeria infection, cardiovascular problems, heart disease, stroke, cataracts, cancer (lung and prostrate especially).
       * Rebalancing estrogen activity (post-menstrual stress and menstrual problems).
       * Boosting the immune system.
       * Helping gall bladder disease.
       * Treating and preventing constipation.
       * Improving night vision and preventing macular degeneration.
       The orange and yellow pigment in vegetables, such as carrots, squash, red peppers, tomatoes, beetroot, and sweet corn, comprises a group of phytochemicals called the carotenes.
       Carrots are a rich source of vitamin A, including betacarotene. Two carrots a day provide more than enough betacarotene, plus vitamins C, E, some B vitamins, and folic acid (essential during pregnancy). They provide many minerals (calcium, phosphorous, sodium, iron, zinc, magnesium, potassium, and copper).
       Raw carrots may inhibit listeria, can reduce the risk of cardiovascular problems, and cut down the risk of lung cancer. Older, darker orange carrots contain more carotenoid antioxidants, which are fat soluble, and more heat stable (preserving the nutrients better when cooked).
       Squash and pumpkins: The dark varieties of squash, such as pumpkin, contain betacarotene, complex carbohydrates, and many of the B vitamins. They also have high levels of potassium and vitamin C. They protect against cancers, particularly lung cancer.
       Beetroot has anti-cancer properties and contains calcium, iron, and vitamins A and C. It is an excellent blood cleanser. Beet fiber is good for bowel function and lowering cholesterol.
       Tomatoes: Fully ripe tomatoes have high levels of betacarotene, plus vitamin C, potassium, and lycopene. A high intake of tomato-based foods has been linked to a reduction in risk of prostrate and other cancers as well as lower incidence of heart diseases, stroke, and cataracts.
       Yellow peppers and sweet corn and some spices-turmeric and mustard-contain curcumin, which protects against skin wrinkling and degenerative conditions, such as heart disease and cancer. Two further carotenes-zeaxanthin and lutein (found in sweet corn, spinach, lettuce, parsley, and brassicas)-can help reduce the risk of macular degeneration, a leading cause of blindness.

Health Benefits of Phytoestrogen* Vegetables
       * Rebalancing estrogen levels.
       * Helping symptoms of post-menstrual stress, menstruation, and menopause.
       * Relieving symptoms of digestive complaints.
       * Cancer prevention.
       * Stimulating liver action.
       Fennel and other aniseed-flavored vegetables and spices contain chemical compounds which mimic the effect of natural estrogens. They boost low estrogen levels, and reduce the overall effect of high estrogen levels. Phytoestrogens are important foods for both sexes.
       Fennel is an excellent digestive aid. It is also a mild diuretic, probably because of its high potassium content. This quality also makes it a useful food for good kidney health and promoting weight loss. Fennel is effective in reducing high blood pressure and is also a useful source of folic acid for pregnancy. An infusion made from fennel seeds can help to relieve the symptoms of cystitis.
       Fennel is higher in the phytochemical coumarin, which helps to prevent cancer, than celery or carrots. Coumarin also helps tone the vascular system and enhances the activity of certain white blood cells.
       (* Phytoestrogen: A naturally occurring compound of plants, such as soybeans, or plant products, such as whole grain cereals, that acts like estrogen in the body.)

Health Benefits of Diuretic Vegetables
       * Preventing water retention and re-establishing mineral levels.
       * Reducing high blood pressure.
       * Helping symptoms of gout, joint pain, and migraine.
       * Preventing cardiovascular disease.
       * Kidney health.
       * Removing excess acid.
       Celery and celeriac are natural diuretics, helping the body to remove excess fluid. The high potassium content and diuretic effect of celery and celeriac can help prevent and reduce high blood pressure. The increase in urine production eliminates excess uric acid and other unwanted substances common to joint complaint, such as gout. This may be why celery appears to reduce the onset and symptoms of migraine, although celery's stimulating effect on the liver may also help.
       The high levels of potassium and other mineral nutrients, such as sodium, make celery a great restorer of electrolyte balance in very hot weather or after a strenuous workout.
       Celery seeds and their extract are useful for removing excess acidity from the body. This reduces joint pain and stiffness. Traditionally, the essential oil of celery and its seeds have been used for their calming effects, because they contain a natural tranquillizer. There is also some evidence that celery can help combat cardiovascular disease.

Health Benefits of the Garlic and Onion Family
       * Lowers cholesterol levels and high blood pressure.
       * Good blood cleanser.
       * Protects against atherosclerosis, heart disease, and stroke.
       * Balances blood-sugar levels.
       * Aids thyroid activity.
       * Promotes detoxification.
       * Boosts the immune system.
       * Protects against cancer, especially of stomach and colon.
       * Kills bacteria, viruses, and moulds/yeasts.
       * Kills intestinal worms.
       * Reduces irritability and the effects of stress and anxiety.
       Garlic is the wonder food of folklore. It contains around 200 biologically active compounds, many of which are believed to be involved in the prevention of heart disease and cancer.
       Garlic can lower the risk of heart attacks and strokes and reduces blood pressure. Some Chinese studies indicate that eating large quantities of garlic can protect against stomach cancer. Studies in America found that garlic was the most protective vegetable against colon cancer. Even two servings a week were effective.
       One clove a day can be useful against coughs, colds, sore throats, against toxic bacteria in the digestive system, in bladder infections, and overgrowth of the yeast candida. Its anthelmintic activity is useful for the treatment of intestinal worms, including threadworms in children. Its immune-stimulating effects have helped asthma sufferers and those with respiratory tract infections. Japanese research has even shown that memory and learning ability may be improved by eating garlic.
       Garlic is very high in many of the trace minerals, especially sulphur, selenium, and germanium. Sulfur is an excellent liver detoxifier and blood cleanser.
       Selenium is now considered to be borderline deficient in many individuals and is an important antioxidant, helping to boost liver function and eliminate harmful substances from the body. Its involvement in thyroid activity and blood-sugar control indicate that selenium, and probably other compounds in garlic, is very useful for those suffering from thyroid disorders and diabetes.
       Garlic is best eaten raw in salads, oven baked as whole cloves, or in sauces. If fried, it should be cooked without browning.
       Crush a clove of garlic with honey and lemon juice and add a cup of boiling water as a home remedy for catarrh (inflammation of the nose and throat with increased production of mucus).
       Onions, shallots, chives, and leeks have many of the same properties as garlic, but to a lesser extent. Leeks are rich in fiber and have been used traditionally to treat sore throats and improve the voice. Onions, too, are extremely useful for respiratory complaints.

Health Benefits of Carbohydrate Vegetables
       * Natural tranquillizers.
       * Reducing high blood pressure.
       * Eliminating excess water.
       * Helping with digestive problems, constipation, and stomach ulcers.
       * Easing chronic fatigue (when well balanced with protein).
       * Helping to build blood and prevent anemia.
       * Cancer prevention (especially sweet potatoes).
       * Cardiovascular health.
       * Clear skin.
       In general, starchy vegetables, such as potatoes, sweet potatoes, and parsnips, are nature's tranquillizing foods. However, too much carbohydrate, even from fresh vegetables, can cause imbalances in blood-sugar levels, which can lead to hunger and tiredness.
       Very sugary, processed carbohydrates have a disastrous effect on blood-sugar balance, aggravating mood swings, irritability, and bad behavior. Excessive sugar intake has been related to hyperactivity in children.
       Potatoes, especially old ones, have good levels of calcium, phosphorous, magnesium, iron, and vitamin C (mainly in the skins), with smaller amounts of zinc and the B complex of vitamins. Folic acid content is high, which makes them excellent for pregnant women and for children. The potassium content is exceptional, making potatoes very good for reducing high blood pressure and encouraging elimination of toxins by the kidneys. Their betacarotene content is reasonable, but much less than that of sweet potatoes.
       Potatoes have a protein content similar to corn or rice, but also contain lysine, an amino acid often lacking in grains, which has been used effectively against cold sores. Potatoes can also benefit those suffering digestive problems, especially constipation and ulcers, chronic fatigue and anemia.
       Potatoes are very easy to digest, and thus suitable for anyone with digestive problems, such as weaning infants and invalids.
       Sweet potatoes generally have more nutrients than potatoes-good levels of magnesium, phosphorous, calcium, and iron, with moderate levels of vitamin C. Folic acid is high. The protein and potassium content are similar to potatoes, but betacarotene levels are higher. The darker the orange pigment, the greater the antioxidant activity. Sweet potatoes are a very rich source of vitamin C (good for cardiovascular health and clear skin).
       Parsnips have very high levels of calcium, phosphorous, sodium, magnesium, and potassium. They have moderate levels of iron, zinc, copper, and some of the B vitamins.
       Caution: Never use potatoes that have green patches on them; this pigment is called solanin and it is a potential poison.

[BOX]
Are green potatoes poisonous?
From the Science of Cooking Web site
       The greenish hue is actually chlorophyll, but it is also an indicator that an alkaloid, called solanine, may be present under the skin of the potato. Solanine develops in potatoes when they are stored in the presence of light (which also encourages chlorophyll formation) and either at very cold or quite warm temperatures. It is toxic, however it would take a very large number of green potatoes to make you ill.
       Since solanine collects just under the skin, it is safe to peel away the skin and a thin layer of white flesh before you cook the potato. The sprouts, too, can be toxic and shouldn't be eaten, though it would take many sprouts to make you ill.
       It's best to check potatoes for any green coloring before you buy them. Then, store them at cool room temperature in a dark, dry place.
[END OF BOX]

Health Benefits of Sea Vegetables
       * Helping reduce high blood cholesterol.
       * Balancing body fluids.
       * Protecting against arteriosclerosis.
       * Assisting thyroid disorders.
       * Anti-cancer properties.
       * Contains anticoagulants for the prevention of abnormal blood clotting.
       * Effective detoxifiers, especially for removing heavy metals from the body.
       * Low caloric content and good for weight loss.
       * Helping in cases of anemia, poor immune system, stomach ulcers and treatment and prevention of osteoporosis.
       * Maintaining the healthy function of the nerves and muscles (including heart muscle).
       * Keeping bones and connective tissue healthy.
       * Good for reproductive health.
       Many countries, especially Japan, have harvested sea vegetables for thousands of years. Most edible seaweeds contain chlorophyll, and more minerals than any other natural food.
       Sea vegetables are fiber-rich and contain excellent levels of copper and iron for healthy blood, magnesium to assist in nerve and muscle function, calcium for healthy bones, potassium for the heart and fluid balance, zinc for a healthy immune system and reproductive health, iodine for active thyroid function, silicon for good skin, cobalt for formation of vitamin B12 and vitamins A, B complex (especially B12), C and E. They are an excellent source of protein and are low in calories.
       Seaweed is a particularly rich source of iodine, and in many parts of the world it has been used to combat the swelling of the thyroid known as goiter.
       There are about 100 varieties of edible seaweed. The most common are:
       Arame: Mild and rather sweet. Add to soups, stews, and stir-fries; good with tofu.
       Dulse: This deep-red seaweed has a strong, salty taste. It is popular in soups and salads, but can be rather tough.
       Hijiki: A strong, black variety. Crisp and tender, but may need longer cooking.
       Kombu: Brown and versatile. Can be used in clear soups, stews, stocks, sauces, and be pickled. Can also be dried, ground, and used as a condiment, thus adding many minerals.
       Laver: This seaweed grows just off the coast of south Wales and Ireland; a traditional breakfast dish of the Welsh.
       Nori: It can be used in large "sheets" for making vegetable, rice, egg or pickled parcels, or with fish as in sushi. Also very good with tofu. Rich in protein and minerals.
       Wakame: Cooks very quickly, thus ideal for adding to soups, stews, beans, and other vegetables towards the end of the cooking time. Also good in salads. Can be ground and used as a condiment.
       Caution: Some seaweeds contain large amounts of sodium and may cause a problem for those with high blood pressure.

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HEALTH

His Strength Is Made Perfect in Our Weakness
From Josiah (of Jewel), Nepal      
       "I'm so thankful for the struggles in life … because these make me come to You, and You always make things so clear and easy to understand. All I have to do is yield and receive. Thank You for all the difficulties that I've had, for the battles that I've had to fight, and how I've had to trust You for the victory. … Thank You for keeping me desperate and close to You, so that I don't run off on my own and get proud, self-righteous, and lifted up. Thank You for all the things You bring my way to keep me humble and dependent on You for the strength and help that I need. Your plan is perfect; it never fails." (TJWL 2:73)
       The Battle: Just one week ago today (at the time of writing this), my back went out on me, as I have damaged vertebrae and discs. I managed to fall into a chair and could not even make it to the bed four feet away for the next two hours, as the pain was so great when I moved. Many things flashed through my mind when I was virtually paralyzed with pain.
       My desperate prayer was: "Oh Lord, I pray this extreme weakness is not going to be a more permanent thing in this new era of action?!-Please, Lord, we have so many plans in the making and I was just getting geared up for more movement and greater things, and now this inaction? Sweet Jesus, I've had this affliction before; please lift me up and give me Your strength as You've done in the past!"
       Background: Before joining the Family in May 1970, I led a fairly active life of travel, sports and a lot of extra-curricular activities. I don't know how I did as well as I did and finished university, as my book study time was usually very minimal; I liked to be out and about doing things. In the course of my unprayerful activities, I had some serious accidents and injuries-debilitating blows to my lower back and right knee while playing university football, which put me out of action for the remainder of the season; a major motorcycle accident and car accident (both as rider), fracturing my tail bone both times; I fell while mountain-climbing at Lake Tahoe and crashed into a rocky stream below while doing drugs; I snapped my lower back while diving from the high rocks off the north shore of the main island of Hawaii and was temporarily paralyzed, having to float in to shore and have a friend carefully drag me up to lay flat on the sand for three or four hours before I could move!
       Taking some of these reference points into consideration, you can imagine how I fully agree with "Mama's Memos, No.9" about being prayerful and careful in considering potentially dangerous recreational activities!-Otherwise you might end up in my state, where I'm thankful just to be able to walk, PTL! But I still like adventure, and I guess that's one reason why I joined the Family in the first place and have chosen to pioneer with my family and young people since the Charter.-It's a blast putting the Lord and souls in first place, and He gives us so much fun along the way, in prayerfully doing it His way!
       In the course of re-pioneering Nepal these last six years, we have put first the Kingdom and the needs of others, and the Lord has blessed us with many special opportunities that we've prayed about to get His direction on and guidance for-super fun outings such as whitewater river rafting through the Himalayan foothills, trekking 4,000 meters high in the Everest region, boating and swimming in the beautiful Phewa Lake, pony trekking through the breathtaking Anna Purna range, jungle safari in the exotic Chitwan wildlife reserve (atop an elephant!), and more!-And all for free, through provisioning or our friends' giving out of gratitude for our ministering to them and/or our volunteer services to their people, TYL! (But I'm getting tripped off from my testimony!)
       Lessons Learned: Back to the present. Over the next couple of days I had to lay flat on my back with minimal movement. I'd learned the hard way one time when this had happened before and I didn't understand the nature of my affliction.-I treated it like sore muscles and tried to do some exercises and had someone vigorously massage my back. This only irritated it the more, causing it to swell up and put even more pressure on the nerves, which was excruciatingly painful.
       The next time it happened, some six years ago when the problem last reappeared, I was a bit wiser, and quietly took prayer time and even had a visitation from dear Dr. Koger. He gave me some good medical advice on how to remedy my immediate situation, and some helpful general counsel on stretching, which has been a key to keeping myself in fairly good shape.
       But this time, my lessons learned were basically this: It's only Jesus! You see, we had been under a lot of stress and pressure regarding our long-term visa, pre-work for airing the TAs on local television, duping the videos locally, mass marketing (as much as possible in this small country), keeping up with our follow-up ministry, lack of personnel, a minor housing crisis, etc. A lot was being required of our small team at this time and we prayed desperately each step of the way and completed our deadlines and then … collapsed!
       I knew that having done all that I could, it had to be the Lord doing the rest, the biggest part-to punch through and get the much-needed victories in the spirit.-And all glory would go to Him, as I was basically an invalid. It's amazing how we don't realize all the strength and power the Lord gives until we are flat on our back.-It's only Jesus!
       So I listened to the Lord, trusted Him with my life and ministry, fought the good fight of faith, loved and praised Him for the victory by faith, and now one week later I'm back slowly doing my morning walk and stretching exercises, and very prayerfully busy out and about with the Lord's work.-What a miracle! My strength is only by God's grace, but what amazes me is that my weakness and the Lord's strength is so extreme.-I can of my own self do nothing, but I can do all things through Him Who strengthens me, PYJ!
       Future: My life, my family, my ministry and my Home are all in His hands. We're still in the middle of the legal tunnel, with only a glimmer of light in the distance. It's difficult to get any official work done here, as the government is so unstable with violent political unrest (going into the 8th government in six years!). We also have so much to do with major CTP commitments, our follow-up ministry (thank the Lord for Activated, which is slowly starting to roll in this Hindu/Buddhist land!), TV airing of the TAs and duping and marketing, road teams, etc.
       But I know (with my recent "collapse" reminder) that I can't do it, but only the Lord can! On one hand, it's kind of scary to trust the Lord, to let go and let God.-But on the other hand, it's freedom! The battle of believing and the fight of faith are ever there, but the Lord gives His peace that passes all understanding.
       In Closing: This might sound pretty basic, one of those spiral lessons that we seem to learn over and over to different degrees, but when the Lord raised me up so quickly I felt convicted to testify of His healing touch. He's the best chiropractor there is, and can tell you just what to do (or direct others to) to bring about His victory. So many people suffer at the hands of physicians, but by quiet prayer and listening to the whispers, Jesus can give us personal counsel on physical therapy, what type of doctor to visit if necessary, or which type of medication or treatment will help, etc.-and lead us on the road to victory.
       P.S.: After reading over this, I just wanted to mention that my recent collapse was not without warnings. The Lord is faithful to give cautions, but because I was on such a works trip, I didn't slow down when it was time to change gears. I had minor pains that should have been heeded but weren't, and thus the collapse. So please don't be fearful, as Jesus doesn't usually just spring these heavies on you, but is merciful to give you some warnings that should be heeded.
       I also wanted to let you know that we just received another year extension on our visa and are gearing up for a new Activated push and full Aurora production, TYJ!-When we are frail, He never fails!

Tips on Handling High Blood Pressure
From Mercy (of Byron), Lithuania
       I have high blood pressure. In my case, I can feel it when my pressure is high. At those times I experience a feeling of pressure on the bridge of my nose, a mild headache, a feeling of confusion and difficulty concentrating or getting involved in more than one thing at that moment, and a feeling of worry.
       When asking the Lord what comes first, the worry or the high blood pressure, He said that usually the blood pressure rises due to physical reasons (heat, tiredness, or improper diet); this is then followed by the worried, muddled feelings. The remedy then is to bring down the blood pressure, and the feelings of worry will vanish.
       Of course, it's not that every time I worry, it is due to high blood pressure, because sometimes I worry when my blood pressure is fine. Yet when it is high, these intensely worried, muddled feelings are caused because the high blood pressure affects the working of the brain.
       It was a big help to my mate and me when the Lord clarified that, because we tended to over-spiritualize the problem, and thought the high blood pressure was caused by my worries and battles. Whereas many times I was not having a battle before my pressure rose, but after it rose I would feel as though I was battling spiritually. It was quite confusing to get these feelings and trials out the blue.
       But after the Lord explained that the high blood pressure causes these feelings, I could handle it much better and concentrate on physical remedies.
       Some that help me a lot are:
       * Apples seem to help more than other fruits. I eat two a day.
       * Drinking lot of liquid, especially diuretic drinks (any drinks which causes you to have to urinate more help to bring the blood pressure down quickly). I like apple juice.
       * Garlic capsules (I have a hard time with fresh garlic). I found some that are combined with hawthorn, which is supposed to help reduce high blood pressure as well.
       * Resting for a couple of hours.
       Some things I have to watch for which seem to bring on high blood pressure are neglecting my diet and eating too much meat or eggs, etc., and not enough fruits and veggies; eating too many sweet things; drinking strong coffee; not having enough sleep; not drinking enough water, and not getting good exercise and fresh air.

[BOX]
Hawthorn (Crataegus oxyacanthas)
Parts used: Berries, young stems, leaves, and flowers
       Common use: Helps treat heart disease and related symptoms. Considered by herbalists to be the world's best cardiac tonic. Used for beginning heart disease, mild heart-muscle weakness, angina, and arrhythmia. Hawthorn promotes healthy blood pressure and cholesterol levels by relaxing blood vessels, increasing metabolism in the heart muscle, and improving blood supply to the heart. Also used for sleeplessness, nervousness, poor digestion, and weight control.
       Hawthorn is rich in bioflavonoids, which relax and dilate the arteries. These compounds are powerful antioxidants that help increase the flow of blood and oxygen to the heart. This reduces the work required by the heart to circulate blood, and in turn reduces blood pressure and stress to the heart muscle. The bioflavonoid substances give strength to the walls of blood vessels and improve blood flow to other areas of the body.
       The herb, usually taken as an extract, is best-used long term, because the active constituents do not produce rapid results. The benefits develop slowly, and have a direct effect on the heart itself, especially in cases of heart damage and heart problems associated with liver disease. It is gentle and safe for long-term use with no toxic side effects.
[END OF BOX]

High Blood Pressure Lowered by Simple Diet Change
By Ed Edelson, Health Scout News Web site
       A British study has some cheery news: Adding more fruits and vegetables to your diet will produce a potentially lifesaving reduction in blood pressure after just six months.
       No drastic changes were advised, say the researchers at the University of Oxford. Instead, healthy individuals recruited for the study were told to increase their intake of fruits and vegetables to at least five portions a day. Specially trained nurses talked with them about potential problems in following the advice-eating out, preparing children's meals-and gave them helpful written materials. A second group of people recruited for the study were not given any advice about diet.
       After six months, the first group increased their intake of fruits and vegetables by an average of 1.4 servings a day, up from an average of 3.4 portions. The unadvised group was eating just about the same 3.4 portions as before.
       Measurements found a net reduction of 2.8 millimeters of systolic blood pressure (that's the higher number in the familiar 120 over 80 reading) and a drop of 1.1 millimeters of diastolic pressure (the lower number) among the people who got-and followed-the advice.
       Andrew W. Neil of the Oxford Institute of Health Sciences, who led the study, says that reduction "would substantially reduce cardiovascular disease at the population level. A reduction of two millimeters in diastolic blood pressure results in a decrease of about 17% in the incidence of high blood pressure, 6% in the risk of coronary heart disease, and 15% in the risk of stroke and transient ischemic attack [TIA]," Neil says. TIAs are temporary, dangerous stoppages of blood flow to the brain.

* * *

NON-ESSENTIALS

Brow Power
From The Eyebrow, by Robyn Cosio with Cynthia Robins

Taking the First Step
       1.       Hold a pencil along the side of your nose, in a straight line perpendicular to your eyebrow. Where brow and pencil meet is where your eyebrow should begin.
       2.       Use the pencil to find where the perfect arch should start. Ideally, your brow should follow the curve of the eye, with the arch hitting its highest point slightly to the outside of the iris. Slant your pencil from the center of your mouth, past the edge of your nose, to the outside corner of your iris. Your arch should be where the inside edge of the pencil meets the brow.
       3.       To determine where your brow should stop, place your pencil again at the center of your mouth and slant it to the outside of your eye.

Tweezing 101
       1.       Brush and Trim: Start off by getting rid of wild hairs. Take an eyebrow brush, sweep upward and then in the direction of your temples to locate the strays. Lift those unruly hairs up and trim them off-one hair at a time-with a pair of small scissors. Err on the long side; you don't want to give your brows an instant crew cut.
       2.       Outline and Erase: Once you've determined what you think is the right shape for your brows, use a small, flat-bristled brush dipped in brow powder (or an eyebrow pencil) to fill in any spaces. Then take a concealer stick or a white eyeliner pencil and "erase" the extra hairs-those that don't fall within the outline. Look at your reflection and judge what you've done. See how your brows look in proportion to the rest of your face. (Drawing the way you think your eyebrow should look gives you a chance to see if it really suits your face before you tweeze them into that shape.)
       3.       Time to Tweeze: If you have sensitive skin, numb it with an ice cube or soak cotton balls in hot water, squeeze them out, and hold them on the brow for a few seconds to open up the follicles. Pull hairs one at a time. If you take too much, the gaps will take weeks to grow back. Remove only those hairs that stray outside your ideal shape.
       4.       Thick Versus Thin: Remember, thin is not for everyone and requires constant maintenance. With thick brows, you need only to define, refine and maintain the line. So before taking the plunge, know exactly what upkeep you're willing to commit to and don't overdo it.
       5.       Post-tweezing: If your skin is red or puffy, apply a clean washcloth dipped in ice water or a cotton ball soaked in witch hazel.
       6.       Grooming: For extra-care times, you can use gel or clear mascara (even a dab of hairspray) on your eyebrow brush, and smooth brows in the direction of the hairs' growth.

When and Where
       The best time to pluck your eyebrows is after you get out of the shower. The pores are still open and it doesn't sting quite as much.

Fill 'Em Up
       If your brows are light or sparse, draw them in with a small, flat, angled brush dipped in brow powder the base color of your hair or slightly darker. Tap off excess powder. Lightly fill. You want an effect that's as close to nature as possible. You can also define with a tinted gel or an eyebrow pencil (just draw softly, so you don't have harsh lines). After using the brush or pencil, brush your brows again with an eyebrow brush to blend the powder and give it a softer look.
       If you're blond, how dark should your eyebrows be? It's completely a matter of taste. Some blondes prefer (and look great with) darker brows.

When You've Gone Too Far
       There have been times when the trend of ultra-skinny brows caused women to shave or tweeze to extremes. The problem? It takes up to a month for hairs to grow back. If you've been overzealous in your shaping, never try to fix brows with more tweezing. Just keep your hands off. You have to play the waiting game. And keep in mind that no two eyebrows are alike. They can vary on your own face, with one brow thicker or higher than the other, so there's really no reason to worry about matching them exactly.

Fixing Touch
       If you accidentally remove too much of your brow, use a brow pencil or powder to fill in the missing hairs. What's the difference? A pencil gives a more defined, tailored brow, while powder gives a fluffy, more natural look. "I generally recommend pencils for people who have very little brow," explains makeup artist Geller, "and powder applied with a brush to fill in the gaps." If you opt for a pencil, choose one that's firm; a heavy, greasy pencil will only make your brow hairs clump together.


[BOX]
       (Dad speaking:) Brows and their styles come and go. You can be sure that what's fashionable today, will be out of style tomorrow. But I know some of you girls like to experiment and try new things-and that's fine if that's what you like. But my advice to you is to be moderate in all things, to not go overboard. Don't be overzealous in plucking your eyebrows just because it's the "in thing" at the time, because you might later regret it.
       Some women do have quite bushy eyebrows, and it would be good for their sample and witness to "tame" them a bit, so to speak-to shape up and trim up. But I'm not for the over-tweezing that some women are into. As I've always said, natural is best-and I'm all for enhancing what the Lord has given you.
       Every woman's brows are different, and that's the beauty of uniqueness. I'm not against you women trimming and shaping up, but I'm not for beauty regimes that take up a lot of time and require continuous upkeep either. So make sure you're not going overboard, that you're being moderate in all things, and not masking the natural beauty the Lord has given you. (End of message.)
[END OF BOX]

After-Shaving Itch
Web reprint
       Q: I have an embarrassing problem: When I shave my underarm area, my skin gets itchy! How can I prevent this?
       A: The most likely culprit: ingrown hairs. These occur when just-shaved hair begins to grow, but curls back around and grows into the skin. Areas like the underarms and bikini line are most prone to this problem because the hair that grows there is usually curly-and therefore more likely to turn back into the skin.
       To keep the problem to a minimum, apply an antiseptic product after shaving-it can do wonders for preventing ingrown hairs. Gently exfoliate the area every day with a grainy scrub or loofah sponge. Also moisturize daily with either a body lotion or lotion-based deodorant.
       If the itchiness still really bothers you, you can try waxing or using a depilatory cream instead of shaving. Both of these hair removal methods leave hair softer and more flexible-and less likely to grow back into the skin.

How Often?
Columbia University's Ask Alice
       Proper hair and scalp care involves washing your hair regularly to remove the normal buildup of dirt, dead skin cells, oils produced by skin glands, and any other substances you put in your hair such as hair spray, etc. The frequency with which you wash your hair depends on the condition of your hair. Basic guidelines are to wash your hair a few times a week for dry hair, and every day or every other day for oily hair.
       If you do choose to wash your hair daily, make sure that you are using a pH-balanced shampoo and only wash it once. If you wash it more than once a day, you will be removing too much of the natural oil found in hair.
       Of the shampoos available on the market, most contain water, foaming agents, fragrances (often added to mask odors of other ingredients), and various amounts of detergents. Shampoos that are designed for oily hair have more detergent than shampoos for non-oily hair. Detergents can make hair less manageable and cause it to lose body. Shampoos with more detergents may also come with "conditioners" which remain on hair even after rinsing, to prevent hair from being completely stripped of oils.
       Here are some guidelines for choosing a shampoo for your particular type of hair:
       * Damaged or fine hair: Try to use a protein shampoo. Shampoo should be more than mildly acidic. Or you can rinse your hair following shampoo with white vinegar and water, or lemon and water. This acid rinse will help to restore a smooth cuticle and shine to your hair.
       * Healthy hair: Regular shampoos are fine. Blondes might try a chamomile shampoo, which has mild bleaching properties. Brunettes might use a henna shampoo, which has mild reddening properties.
       * Oily hair: Use a lemon-based shampoo.
       * All types: Jojoba-based shampoo is successful in treating scalp conditions as well as dissolving sebum buildup. It leaves your hair clean and shining.
       * For all types of hair, try alternating shampoos. Use one type once or twice a week and the other once or twice a week. Change brands every few months to keep your hair shiny and full of life. Diet (as well as the other health rules) plays an important role in hair care also, so pay attention to what you eat and try to incorporate a healthy balance of foods.

Dad on Hair Care
       There's just something about letting your hair down that really does it and turns us on! It's just like the rest of the way God made you: It's absolutely glorious! However, in the heat of some countries you may want to tie it up to keep cool!
       And remember: never use too much soap, shampoo or hot water on your hair, or it will dry it out and make it lusterless, dry and brittle.-And never take a wet head out in the cold after a washing, unless you want your death of cold! In cold weather always dry your head thoroughly inside a warm house or in front of a heater or fire, and try to remain inside for at least an hour or so before braving the wind and the weather, and even then make sure you wear some kind of hat or scarf in wintry temperatures. Although your hair may be dry, your scalp has absorbed a lot of moisture, the cold evaporation of which can cause you to catch cold.
       Just remember in all these things, when it comes to the body and the things of the flesh, whether it be diet, dress, hair, style, sex, charm or personality, the natural and normal ways are always the best and most beautiful, the happiest and most healthful-just the way God made you!-And that's really revolutionary! ("Revolutionary Women," ML #250:10-12,14)

* * *

FITNESS

Want to Lose Weight? Eat Something!
By Liz Neporent, Web reprint
       When your stomach is empty and growling, your body's primary directive is to get you to eat, to fill your energy tank and fuel your body. But if you don't refuel within 30 minutes of those first biological signals, your blood-glucose level plummets even more, causing you to get a headache or heartburn and to feel nauseated or irritable. When you finally do stop to eat, you can't help but overdo it.
       Instead, listen to your appetite signals and refuel right away. You'll feel energized immediately. And because you were hungry but not famished when you began eating, you are more easily satisfied with a moderate amount of food.
       Small, frequent meals that constantly refuel your body provide big, long-lasting benefits. Too much time elapses between breakfast, lunch, and dinner, and we eat too much food in the evening.
       Instead, try eating five smaller meals a day (three lighter meals and two good snacks). It will double your energy while controlling your weight. Just be sure you don't make the mistake of eating five courses at each of those five meals. Have cereal for breakfast, fruit and yogurt midmorning, half a sandwich at lunch, the other half mid-afternoon, and a modest-sized dinner that could fit in your hand.
       Diet crazes have made us doubt our body's messages. Don't give in to the "Carbs are hazardous to your health and your waistline" myth. It's also time to relax restrictions against certain "taboo" foods, namely anything with fat. Your body needs fat and probably craves it too. Most women do. A study from England found that when women cut their fat intake in half, their dispositions take a nosedive too. They get angrier, moodier, and more hostile. (Of course, it's best to focus on the "good fat," the monounsaturated type found in olives, olive oil, canola oil, soybeans, soybean oil, tofu, nuts, peanut oil, and avocado.)
       The best way to stop overeating fat is to stop restricting it. People who try to eat only fat-free foods are sure to make up for it with a high-fat binge later. If you eat a moderate amount of fat, you'll gain energy without gaining any weight.
       While we're stopping the oil embargo, we might as well halt the sugar sanction too. The trouble with sugar is it usually causes energy crashes. A simple carbohydrate, sugar is quickly digested and absorbed, leading to a dip when that surge of energy disappears.
       There is, however, a way to avoid such a roller coaster: Don't eat sugar by itself. Make sure there's something else present in your stomach that will slow digestion and absorption. Drink a glass of milk with that cookie, nibble a slice of cheese with that apple, have a little yogurt with those berries.
       So, give yourself permission to eat, and you will outsmart both your female fatigue and your fat cells.

[IN A BOX]
       Remember that walking, cycling and weightlifting aren't the only types of activities that will help you lose fat. You can burn extra calories just by being more active during the day-raking leaves, vacuuming the living room, mowing the lawn.
       --Kathy Smith's Fitness Makeover

* * *

SEX AND ROMANCE

It's All in the Attitude
By Mark Merrill, the Family Minute
       One of your most important marital attributes is your attitude! Life is 10% what happens to you and 90% how you react to it. So how can we change a bad attitude?
       First, look for the positive. Abraham Lincoln said, "If you look for the bad in mankind expecting to find it, you surely will."
       Second, refuse to play the victim. Self-pity is a luxury no marriage can afford.
       Third, give up grudges. They only clog the veins of a positive attitude.
       Finally, changing an attitude won't occur overnight, so be patient and don't give up.

       (Dad speaking:) Like I always said: Keep your eyes on the doughnut and not on the hole. Your life, and certainly any relationship or marriage, can be a misery if you're always looking at the bad, what you don't have, or the problems and difficulties. Looking on the bright side and being positive and praiseful makes a world of difference and brings the Lord's blessings. (End of message.)

Winning Ways to Keep Marriage Strong
By John Gottman, Ph.D.
The Bottom Line
       Traditional marriage counseling focuses on repairing longstanding problems. Most troubled couples wait an average of six years before they seek help. A new approach is to teach relationship skills early, before negative habits become entrenched and destructive.
       At the Seattle Marital and Family Institute, we have studied hundreds of couples to see what leads some to happiness and others to break up. Based on our research, we have developed techniques to strengthen marriages and help spouses deal with conflict.
       * Balanced marital ecology. Critical to any marriage is a healthy relationship between positive and negative emotions toward each other. In case after case, we have found that the ideal ratio is five times as many positive feelings as negative ones.
       This ratio of positive to negative feelings not only nurtures your relationship but also builds up your emotional reserves when arguments and ill feelings strike-as they do in any close relationship.
       Important: Don't expect to eliminate all negative emotions toward your spouse. Couples need to air and resolve disagreements. Most stable couples see their conflicts not as divisive but as shared and strengthening experiences.
       * Accentuate the positive. To keep your own positive ratio high, don't allow everyday tasks and commitments to crowd out thoughtfulness, affection and closeness. Give thoughtful compliments, call each other during the day just to check in, and share private time together.
       Consciously appreciating your spouse's good qualities also helps you maintain the vital positive-negative ratio when negativity appears.
       * List your partner's positive contributions to your life together. Reflect on how much harder life would be without those contributions. When you find yourself mentally criticizing your mate, "interrupt" your thinking with positive items from the list. Dispel negative feelings after a disagreement by looking through vacation picture albums or remembering your best times together ... even reading old love letters. See the relationship as half-full rather than as half-empty to defuse potentially irritating situations.
       Example: If your partner leaves dirty dishes in the sink for several nights in a row, don't blow up. Think of all the other things he/she does to help the house run smoothly.      
       Complain without being critical. Voicing grievances is healthy and positive in a marriage. Attacking your spouse's character is not.
       Important: Criticism often begins with the word "you," as in, "You're too irresponsible to call when you're going to be late." Blaming and accusing lead to anger and resentment.
       Better: Complaints that begin with the word "I" and deal strictly with the specific behavior you would like changed. Addressing an issue rather than a character flaw allows room for discussion. Example: "I wish you had let me know you wouldn't be home on time."
       Contempt, which goes beyond criticism to insults, name-calling, hostile humor and mockery, must be completely banned from marital discussions. You can guard against the temptation to voice contempt by not seeing arguments as a way to retaliate or exhibit moral superiority.
       * Instead of criticism, contempt and kitchen-sinking-dragging a multitude of grievances into an argument-I advocate gentle confrontation. This involves emphasizing that you love your spouse and that your complaint concerns behavior he can, indeed, change. You can also say that you are bringing up the issue only to strengthen your relationship.
       * Structure your arguments. When arguments intensify, both spouses may experience emotional flooding-sharply elevated heart rate and blood pressure and increased adrenaline secretion. All stimulate a fight-or-flight reaction-an attack or a defensive withdrawal. That is always fatal to mutual understanding or problem solving.
       Helpful: Put a 15-minute limit on arguments. If either of you feels flooded, call a 20-minute time-out. Since continued negative thoughts and feelings of revenge will only reinforce flooding, we stress positive thinking during the time-out. Example: Say to yourself, "We have a good marriage" or, "We still love each other." When both of you are calm, continue the discussion for another 15 minutes.
       * Communicate non-defensively. When you react defensively, you unintentionally sidetrack arguments rather than resolve them. In addition, the stonewalling defense of silence and withdrawal usually leads the blocked spouse to attack harder in hopes of getting through. Instead, use non-defensive speech, which cools down the argument and helps both parties feel more positive.
       Even if you can't give sincere praise and admiration, really listening signals to your partner that you understand his or her feelings, even if you don't share them. Example: "That's a good point."

FOR ADAM…
Give Her a Sensual Bath
By David Strovny, Web reprint
       Giving your woman a sensual bath can be a heavenly experience-given you know what you're doing. Lucky for you, I'm here to help provide the essential ingredients necessary to make such an evening perfect.
       Now before we get started, decide where this water-filled episode is going to occur: Make sure that the bathroom is spotless. Not just the bathtub; ensure there aren't any little hairs all over the floor, there isn't mold on the tiles, and that no dirty clothes or towels are lying around.
       As well, keep in mind that this bath isn't intended to cleanse her body; it's to help her relax and feel sexy. And yes, it is possible to do both at the same time.

Ingredients: Here's what you'll need to make the experience a perfect one:
       a. Candles
       b. Music
       c. Bath pillow
       d. Bubble bath, bath salts and/or bath oils
       e. 2 towels (one large, one small)
       f. Large empty cup
       g. Sponge (something to rub all over her skin)
       h. Shampoo
       i. Wine (or other drinks)
       j. Bucket with ice
       k. 2 wine glasses
       l. Strawberries (and/or other sensual fruit)
       m. Body cream (for later)
Set the scene:
       Candles: Now it's time for you to make sure that the scene is set for a sensual experience. Place candles all over the bathroom (in areas where the flames won't cause damage). You might want to opt for candles in glass jars, thus avoiding a potentially waxy mess.
       Music: Whether you plan to bring your CD player into the washroom (keep it away from the water!) or just put the music louder from another room, the music you select shouldn't drown out your conversation or her ability to relax. Opt for something soft and sensual.
       Drinks: Place the bottle in a large bucket of ice, and place the glasses next to it. Make sure not to leave the bottle too close to the water to avoid any accidents.
       Fruit: Whether you've opted for strawberries, grapes or cherries, prepare the fruit and keep it covered and refrigerated until you're ready to start feeding her slowly.
       The bath: Fill the bath with hot water (but not so hot that you can't bear to leave your hand under the running water). Slowly add in the bubble bath, oils and salts.
       Leave the bath pillow, the shampoo and the sponge on the side for now...
       Bring her to bathe: When you do finally get her to the tub, help her get in (it may be a little slippery) and lie down. Place the bath pillow under her neck so she can relax in style.
       Keep the small towel nearby because you will have to constantly dry your hands off. Before you start playing around in the water, pour the drinks and toast with her about something significant to you. Then slowly feed her some fruit, but not all. Save some for later.
       Now soak the sponge and run it up and down her body slowly. First, go across her shoulders, then her back, then come around her stomach and move slowly down her legs. When you've covered her entire body, soak the sponge up with water and squeeze the excess water down her back (or her chest, mmm).
       When the sponge begins to bore you, use your hands to play exploration. Play around by rubbing the inside of her thighs, and … rubbing the back of her neck, and even gently massaging her breasts.
       When you're done getting your feel, give her a little more drink and fruit, and begin your shampoo journey. Wet her hair slowly by filling the cup with bathwater and pouring it on her hair-try not to wet her face. Have her lean against the tub and relax her neck. Place a quarter-sized amount of shampoo into your hand and begin massaging it into her hair, concentrating on her roots. Do this for a few minutes, then take the cup, fill it with clean warm water and pour it over her hair while she leans her head back.
       Let her out: Before she begins to shrivel up, unplug the bathtub and let her rinse herself off thoroughly in the shower. When she comes out, use one large towel to cover her body and the other to cover her hair (if she let you wash it).
       Bring her to your bedroom, sit her down on the bed and towel dry her hair. If you think you can be gentle enough to brush or comb her hair, then do so. But I don't recommend it if she has naturally curly hair; the last thing you want to do is make love to a woman who you've just made half bald.
       Moving along, gently towel dry her body, lay her on the bed and apply cream to her body. Now don't saturate her body with cream; just use a small amount on areas like her elbows, knees, feet, and anywhere else she asks.
       Happy endings: So what's the best way to end off this great treat you've given her? After all, you can imagine how relaxed she's feeling after her hot bath. It's time to rejuvenate her body … in whatever creative way you please.

Getting to the root of marriage problems.
By Mark Merrill, The Family Minute
       There's a large vine that wraps around a big oak tree in my back yard. If I don't cut it down, it will eventually kill the oak. If I could get to the vine's root, the problem would be solved.
       In marriage, the vine of destruction is impatience, unkind words and lack of self-control: they can eventually choke the life out of our relationship. But the root cause of these problems is selfishness-doing what's best for ourselves, whether it hurts the other person or not. So root out selfishness, and help your marriage grow stronger.
       (Dad speaking:) Amen! As I said, pride is the root of all sin, but selfishness is sure a very close second. If every mate would make a personal commitment to attack and root out selfishness in his or her own life, what a turnaround you would see in so many areas! And this applies not just to husbands and wives, but to each and every Family member, in everything you do. Don't let the Enemy's evil weeds take root in your garden! Call on the Father today, and let Him dig out the roots, as only He can. (End of message.)