Home Children of God Publications So What!--Dad's Farewell!--On His Dying Bed with Family Gathered 'Round

The Family / Children of God

Internal Publications and Secret Directives

DISCLAIMER: The sole purpose of this page is to document the existence of a publication produced by The Family International a.k.a. The Family, Family of Love, Children of God and various pseudonyms (hereon referred to as TFI). It is provided for the record, for educational and research purposes, with the principal aim of promoting accountability by the TFI for its teachings and statements, which have proven detrimental to the lives of many. By replicating this material, exFamily.org neither endorses the views expressed in this publication nor justifies the existence of this publication and its statements. Reader discretion is advised. The material on this page may be unsuitable for minors and may contain disturbing words of racism, hate mongering, directives to unhealthy lifestyles and/or criminal activity, and/or contain plagiarized works.
THIS PUBLICATION MAY HAVE BEEN "SANITIZED." This digital format of this publication was extracted from TFI's HomeARC 99, which was subjected to encryption and editing by TFI, who, in order to hide its controversial writings and thus escape moral and/or legal accountability for past/present core beliefs and directives, sanitized (edited) and purged (deleted, destroyed, burned) its texts—both printed and electronic. Where possible, exFamily.org has compared this digital material with the cult's original paper-printed versions to ensure that this publication accurately reflects the original, uncensored version. Locations where the text has obviously or potentially been sanitized is hilighted with bright-red [DELETED] or [EDITED] markers.

SO WHAT!DO 28613/93

INTRO TO "SO WHAT!"3/93

(The following phone messages, one of which was sent to you, our worldwide Family, & the rest to your leadership, will explain why the following Letter, "So What!", was so significant & such a miracle!)

Message number one:
Prayer Request for Dad!
(From Peter:) Dad is seriously sick! Saturday night he was up most of the night with a terrible cough, which seems to be down in his lungs. He also had a fever, & a headache. Mama also then started to feel sniffly, with a cough & ticklish throat. Sunday Dad started having chills, to the extent he was shaking violently for over an hour. Sunday night he had a fever all night, along with this terrible cough, & was in a semi-conscious state, not even able to speak with Mama for 16 hours!
After these two very restless nights with fevers & coughing off & on, his fever broke, & for the first time, despite a huge lump in his throat, he was able to take in some nutrition after not having had anything for 18 hours. After coming out of his delirious state, Dad said, "Has the day passed?" Mama told him he'd slept all day & all night too, & he said, "Well, I guess this is it." And she said, "What? Do you mean you think you're going to die now? The Lord's promised to heal you." He said, "Well, death is the best healing of all."
So please pray desperately that the Lord will raise him up, as well as for the protection of Mama & any others around them from coming down with this. We very much appreciate & need your prayers at this time. GBY!

Message number two:
Urgent Prayer Request to All Homes!
(From Mama:) Dear Family, Thank you for your commitment to pray daily for Dad. The Lord has been answering your prayers, & his liquids have been going down much more easily. Dad is now recovering from a serious respiratory illness & is completely bedridden & very weak. Again, we'd appreciate very much your fervent effectual prayers, that he will regain his strength speedily. Please pray for Peter, too, who is very ill.
And do continue your prayers for the Argentina situation, which is supposed to be decided within the next few days. Things appear quite bleak, so we desperately need a miracle. There are many battles, but they can all be won through prayer, & only through prayer. "So shall I grant these petitions, but not without a fight, not without a huge battle, that ye may see the power of prayer & that ye may learn that the victories depend solely upon thy prayers!" So do not surrender nor become weary in battle! "Be not faithless but believing." God bless you, dear ones, we love you very much.
--Mama.

Message number three:
Prayer Request for Dad in the Hospital
(From Mama:) Thank you for your continued prayers for all of us here. Although this sickness really is quite stubborn, those of us who were sick are recovering, though still weak. Please pray especially for Dad, who had become so weak that he was sleeping 24 hours a day, unable to wake up enough to get sufficient nourishment to give him his strength that he needs to recover, & as a result, we had to admit him to the hospital where they put him on a glucose drip. We are praying desperately for the situation, & that somehow the Lord will intervene & give him the boost of energy that he needs to recover from this illness. From being sick for so long, his energy supplies have been completely depleted, & now he needs an extra heavy dose of energy & strength.
We've just heard that he hasn't been given anything to eat, & his hands are quite cold & his speech is slurred, so we don't know what this indicates. We also just learned that they gave him insulin for his high blood sugar. (Dad's blood sugar level was high because during his illness he could only drink juice drinks, & these had a high level of natural sugar.) Several of our staff will take turns staying with him 24 hours a day, so please please pray for their strength, as they are already very run-down & on the verge of sickness themselves.
a) Please pray that the Lord will do a miracle to heal Dad, as it seems the hospital isn't doing much, although they're concerned & interested.
b) That the Lord will supply a private room.
c) That He will give strength to the bodies of our already weakened staff.
d) That He will keep them from contracting any diseases from those in the hospital.
e) That He'll comfort Dad in this time of great affliction.
--Love, Mama.

Message number four:
Request for Continued Prayer for Dad
(From Peter:) GBY! Thank you again & again for so faithfully battling for us in prayer. Your prayers move the Lord's hand as He answers our specific requests. Mama has also been sick, but has recovered enough to be able to visit with Dad in the hospital, which was a real blessing. After Dad spent one night in a room with four other men, the Lord supplied a semi-private room for him, with only one other person in the room. He also raised up a very sweet doctor & a nutritionist who have taken an interest & have been helpful. They continue to give Dad shots of insulin, which has helped to bring down his blood sugar level, & they have kept him on intravenous feeding. He's also been able to get down a number of glasses of juice very well, thank the Lord, though he hasn't had anything more substantial than that, since with this sickness he has lost his appetite. They say they plan to give him some antibiotics soon to help his body fight infection. He's been more alert & his speech is no longer slurred, but he's still very weak & will need to remain in the hospital for some time.
a) Please pray that he will be willing & able to drink some nutritional drinks, as he needs them to gain strength.
b) Pray that he will have no adverse reactions to the antibiotics.
c) That the Lord will keep Dad & our staff members from contracting any diseases from those in the hospital.
Love, Peter.

Message number five:
Update on Dad & Prayer Requests!
(From Peter:) Since our last message, Dad has been able to get down some nourishing drinks, which has strengthened him & has helped bring his blood sugar level down to normal. PTL! He's been quite chipper & was able to get out of bed with help & go to the bathroom. He's been diagnosed as having pneumonia, which doesn't seem to be having any visible effect on him as far as his overall health, but that could develop into something serious if it doesn't clear up quickly, & to that end they are giving him a lot of antibiotics.
a) Please pray that the pneumonia heals up right away.
b) For Dad's security while in the hospital.
c) That he will be willing & able to continue to drink nourishing drinks.
d) That he will have the strength to walk & move around, as it helps to break up the pneumonia in his lungs.
e) That he will have no adverse reactions to the antibiotics.
f) That the Lord will keep Dad & our staff members from contracting any diseases from those in the hospital.
--Love, Peter.

Message number six:
Dad Home from the Hospital!
Thank you so much for your prayers for Dad! The Lord miraculously healed him of the pneumonia & kept his security while in the hospital. The doctors agreed to release him & he's been back home for two days. However, upon his return he took a turn for the worse & it seemed like he wasn't going to be with us much longer. He was seeing visions of Heaven & was talking about going. He wasn't eating & was getting weaker & weaker. The Lord strengthened him enough for him to give a farewell talk to us all as we gathered around his bed. From that point on, the Lord miraculously raised Dad up! He's eaten & gotten out of bed on his own, which he hasn't been able to do for weeks. He sat up in bed & edited a new Letter, though still very weak. Please continue to pray for his strength & for a full recovery.

(Following is Dad's bedside talk, "So What!":)

SO WHAT!DO 2861 3/93
--Dad's Farewell!
--On His Dying Bed with Family Gathered 'Round.

1. (To Peter:) Just kneel down by the bed, that's the best place for you to be, humble on your knees. Give me your hand. Thank You Lord! (Tongues) "Lord bless this one who has been my soldier & standby & strong protector, & has now come to where he must carry on." Bless him, Lord, strengthen him now. You can touch & heal him so he doesn't have to be worried with this cold.
2. Do you think you're going to live? (Peter: Yes, Sir!) Very good! Here's a man of faith, he believes he's going to live! Do you believe I'm going to die? (Peter: If you decide you've had enough of this life, yes, I do.) Then the Bible is wrong. (Peter: Why?) "He that believeth on the Son shall never die."--John 11:26. (Peter: Yes, you'll live eternally.) So what's better than that? (Peter: There's nothing better than that, but it's pretty good to keep living right here & now as part of that eternal life.) My God, how you people look at things on this Earth! (Peter: We love you, Dad, & we really like to have you here.)
3. Lamont got killed in World War 2, & my Mother had a dream of him walking up this long avenue of beautiful trees where he met his sister. He said, "How come everybody else is crying, & you guys aren't crying?" And his sister said, "We look at things differently Up Here." (See ML #818:22-38.) You've gotta learn how to look at things differently, okay?--And quit your crying & lamenting over me. You've got to look to the future! You've got to look to how wonderful things are going to be!--How wonderful they are now! Thank You Jesus!
4. (Peter coughs) Lord, rebuke this cough right now, in Jesus' name! Lay your hands on him. Rebuke this thing right now, Lord, in Jesus' name! Strengthen him, rest him, help him not to worry. Help him to take it easier & to just rest in You & do good. Lord help him! Help him to know that he can just rest in You, Jesus! Thank You Lord! Help him to trust in You, Lord. "Come unto Me, all ye that are weary & heavy laden, & I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you & learn of Me, for I am meek & lowly of heart, & ye shall have rest unto your souls."--Mat.11:28-30. Praise the Lord! Thank You Lord! "For I am meek & lowly in heart!"
5. "One thing is needful, & Mary has chosen that good part, which shall never be taken away from her."--Luk.10:42. Do you know, Peter, that you can be a Mary if you just keep your eyes on the Lord? That's all you have to do. Thank You Jesus? (Peter: Amen.) I always trusted that the Lord would make you a real Mary, because I know you've got a lot of love for the Lord & a lot of faith. Thank You Jesus! You're all Marys in a way, praise the Lord!
6. Do you know that the only people who look happy in here are the kids? Thank God for David, at least he can trust the Lord. You don't see them sitting there glum & gloomy. Praise the Lord! Wouldn't this make a beautiful deathbed scene? Wow! That beautiful picture on the wall & our dear future in front of us, Techi & David. Why can't you guys pull up a few chairs, stools, bumps on the logs or something, instead of standing?
7. So you want to know what the Lord showed me? Oh boy! Well, there's nothing new about it at all. I'm feeling better all the time, the more of you that gather around here listening to the Lord instead of worrying that I'm going to die. My God! What are you worried about? This guy here (Peter, kneeling on the floor by Dad's bed) is smarter than all the rest of you! He's like John, who laid his head on Jesus' bosom. (Jn.13:25.) It's more important to lay your head on Jesus' bosom.
8. It's a lesson for all of you. It's more important for you to just sit at Jesus' feet. "Come unto Me, all ye that are weary & heavy laden." Are you weary? Are you heavy laden? He said, "I will give you rest." Don't worry about it. Amen? "Thou art encumbered with much serving."--Luk.10:40. My God, there's too much serving in this Family & not enough resting! So why don't you just rest & cast your burden on the Lord, & He will sustain you. Trust the Lord! Amen? Thank You Jesus! Don't worry! Some of you are encumbered with too much serving. The serving is important, serving is good & it's got to be done, but you can't be so worried.
9. My, what beautiful people! How could we ever lose? Thank You Jesus! See, this man (Peter) hath chosen that good part, just to rest at Jesus' feet. Praise the Lord!
10. Don't worry about it! (Sings:) "Keep your eyes on Jesus, do not watch the waves. Keep your eyes on Jesus, 'tis faith in Him that saves!" Cat got your tongue? (Family joins in:) "Keep your eyes on Jesus, His promises avail! Keep your eyes on Jesus, praise God, He cannot fail!" Thank You Jesus! Praise the Lord!
11. (Prays against noise outside:) God damn you, Devil, in Jesus' name! Rebuke that Satanic noise out there!
12. See, that's what Peter needs, he needs some sleep, he needs a little rest, just to hang on to the Lord's hand & not worry. You've been worrying too much. Now, isn't this more restful than trying to write letters? Do you think the World's going to fall apart while we're here? (Peter: Not at all!) Isn't this quiet & peaceful? (Fam: Yes.) We haven't been this quiet & peaceful in a long time, have we? Praise the Lord! Some of you guys think you've got to hurry hurry hurry, work work work, write write write, or the World's going to go to pieces! But it won't.
13. This reminds me of my farewell bedroom scene at TSC. The trailer wasn't very big, but at least we did have a little room. Of course, we didn't have so many leaders then either. We didn't have such good-looking ones either, thank You Jesus! I'll never forget that day. I don't think there was even one of you here that was there then, except Mama. Big Josh was there that day of our farewell before we left TSC to flee to Europe, & who else, Mama?
14. By the way, did we have fun last night! Boy oh boy oh boy, we had such a boat ride in the Heavenly realm as you will never ... yes, you will believe! You're going to have one too, one of these days. It was just beautiful. That was lots of fun. Thank You Jesus! I'm looking forward to having some fun!
15. How can you guys stay so beautiful all the time? Son, how many years have you been with me? (Peter: 15 years living with you.) Yes, but how many years have you been in the Family? (Peter: 21-, something like that.) What makes you think you could fail now? (Peter: I could fail any time, but I know the Lord's not going to fail.) Well, that's why you're not going to fail. (Peter: I believe that.) People here are worried all the time that they're going to fail sometime, & you haven't failed yet!--Including Mama. She can't fail! Because if anything happens to Mama, we'd all be sunk! But that's not true! Because the Lord will never fail & we will never be sunk.
16. Oh my, how many years ago did we say goodbye to the Family at TSC, Mama? It must have been almost 23 years ago now! Just think, this beautiful boy over here (David) wasn't even around, & this beautiful girl (Techi) wasn't around either. How many more of you beautiful people weren't there at that great farewell of the departure of the Shepherd? (Peter: None of us were there, just Mama.) Well, a lot of those people present probably thought they were indispensable. They were weeping & crying & thinking they weren't going to be able to make it, & thought they were the only ones to carry on. How could God carry on without them? And worst of all, how could God carry on without me? I said, "Forget it, Mama, let's just gallop off to Europe & have a good time! If this Work is of God, it can't fail! If it's of Man, it'll come to nought, & it just might as well." Amen? (Fam: Amen.)
17. Can you guys see what's happened since then? (Fam: Yes!) Look at what's happened since then! We've never had such a big explosion of getting out our Message! I kept writing Letters over the years saying, this is it! Next year, this was it! Next year, this was it! Peter, when have we stopped exploding? (Peter: We haven't yet, thank the Lord! Things are getting better every year.)
18. The Lord even stopped that silly little noisy imp out there. How many times has he tried to do that to us? It seems like we've never had a Family meeting yet but the Devil has tried to stop us. And here you are sitting on the floor & stools & benches & beds & everything else, worried that God's going to let the Devil stop us. It's so funny, it's really funny!
19. Oh my God, there's that big fancy woman, all decked with her jewels & riding on the neck of the Beast! (See Rev.17.) When did the Prophet have that vision? (Fam: It was John, wasn't it?) Yes, John had the vision. It was the Lord's revelation, not John's revelation. Quit thinking that the only revelations you can get are from me. That is so funny!--Ha! The whole thing was from the Lord! Really! What's the matter, can't you still laugh? You're not going to stop getting revelations from the Lord! Did the World stop getting revelations from the Lord when John died? (Fam: No.)
20. Don't give anybody but the Lord the credit! When St. John died, they must have thought everything was going to collapse, right? Has anybody got an idea who was the next revelator? Come on, let's have a Bible class, okay? Some people think I'm dying, ha! The joke is on them! (Everybody laughs!) Ha, ha! Some people think I can't live without a few calories or a little protein.
21. Is everybody all right? See, even Mama's still able to sit up. She hasn't collapsed yet! And when she does, then you'll carry on! And when you do, somebody else will carry on. It's been 2,000 years since Jesus was here on Earth. Has Christianity collapsed? (Fam: It's flourished!) Yes! It's still here, in spite of the old Devil & that old Witch (the Great Whore, Rev.17:1)! Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Lord, I thank You for this little bit of water. (Sips.)
22. (To Peter:) God bless you, Son, I love you. When I'm gone, you're going to keep on preaching away, just like you did in the past! Look at all the things the Lord has done with you that you never dreamed of! (Peter: Well....) Don't say, "Well ... !" (Peter: Amen, I agree!) You'd better give Him the thanks! (Peter: I do, He did it all.) He's done it every time! (Peter: Amen, that's right.) So you don't have to worry about it! Mama, are you still there? Mama likes to take a back seat, God bless her. I love you, Honey. And you're never going to fail. In fact, the Lord is not going to leave you alone, or you, Techi. Praise the Lord!
23. This is a very important meeting. Do you realise it? I know I probably haven't had enough meetings lately. (Before taking a sip of water:) "Jesus gave her water that was not in the well." (John 4.) Bless this water I'm trying to drink now, Lord, & bless this water of the Word that I'm trying to give to Thy people today.
24. I don't think there's anybody here who can say I'm not funny. That's the way the Lord made me, to cheer you up.--To get you over all these silly, ridiculous, absolutely idiotic concerns & worries. The Lord's not going to forsake you, He's not going to leave you! Even when the Lord Himself took off for Heaven & His disciples were all crying & weeping & worrying, what happened next?--They had one of the biggest witnessing explosions they'd ever had! Right? Well, the same thing happened when Mama & I left for Europe. We kissed them all goodnight that night, told them the Lord would take care of them & not to worry about it.
25. And we took a plane, the funniest little airline you ever saw, called Icelandic Airlines, because it was so cheap, only one hundred Dollars a head. And I was the only one on that whole plane over 40!--All hippies! They looked at me like, "What are you doing here?" Like that hippie did in the Light Club that first night when I kerplopped on the floor in my old clothes & beret. First of all, they knew I wasn't a narc (a drug-traffic detective), so he finally decided to get friendly. He said, "Hi, Dad" or "Hi, Pop." I've forgotten what he called me. "What are you doing here? What's your bag?" I said, "Oh, I'm just here to hear what's going on. What are you doing here?" He said, "I'm waiting for the sandwiches."--Ha! Mama, can't you laugh a little? (Mama: Yes, you're always funny.) It's never happened yet, has it? (Mama: What?) Ha! Leave it to her to say "what"! I'm talking about my demise.
26. It's not even lunchtime yet, so you guys don't have to worry about starving. You haven't died yet, have you? Don't you think it's important, what I'm trying to tell you? (Fam: Yes, Sir.) I know I'm slow, & I know it takes me a long time to talk. And I know that Mama thought I might be dying--& I might be, who knows? Praise the Lord? So what?! So what?! That sounds like a good title! I haven't died yet!
27. You guys didn't think I had enough strength to even have this little chat with you. How many of you guys are surprised? How many of you guys who attended me most personally are surprised that I have demonstrated this much strength? Come on, be honest! (Fam: We know you've got it in you!) (Fam: You've been doing this every day!) Then what are you worried about?
28. I'm almost done, believe it or not. You guys usually eat lunch about 1:30, don't you? So, you've only got an hour-&-a-half to go. Do you think you'll die between now & then? (Fam: No.) Do you think I'll die between now & then? (Fam: No! Absolutely not!) See? There were some people who thought I was going to die this morning, God bless them. But the Lord is merciful to them, & in spite of everything I did or wouldn't do, I am still here.
29. What the Hell do you think those prophets lived on for 40 days & 40 nights, anyhow?--All the way from Moses to Elijah, even Jesus? Huh? And you're afraid I can't live without a little sip of juice! (Sings:) "What did Jesus do, without a cup of fruit juice? What did Moses do without a drink of milk?" For goodness sake, folks, Jesus Himself told you, "Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every Word which proceedeth out of the mouth of God!"--Mat.4:4. Hallelujah! Thank You Jesus! PTL! That ought to encourage you!
30. (To one of the girls:) Are you worried, Dear? (Fam: No, Sir.) Are you worried I might die by 1:30? (Fam: No, you won't.) Are you worried that I might die tomorrow? She's not quite as sure about that! You know what people do? They worry more about the future than anything else. You all are pretty sure, especially right now--some of you were not too sure this morning--that I am going to live at least right now, right? (Fam: Yes.) And that maybe I won't even die after 1:30. But what about tomorrow? Are you sure I'm going to live tomorrow? Of course you're not! You're not supposed to be sure. Right?
31. As at least three people in this room can tell you, I am stronger right this minute than I have been for three weeks! Were you expecting that? (Fam: No.) Were you expecting that, Mama? (Mama: Not exactly.) Ha! (Mama: When you get all the family here, you get an added boost!) All right then! (Fam: An audience brings out the best.) (Mama: Yes, you're doing better since you've gotten an audience.) (Fam: Yes, bring out the food!) I'm doing better without the food, brother! You're the guys that need the food. Prophets don't need food. (Peter: But Jesus ate!) Oh yes, well, of course. I'm glad I've got a good student over there. He ate when He was physical. (Peter: Even afterwards.) Yes, but He didn't need to eat then. (Peter: He did, though.) Yes, He did, to encourage His disciples.
32. (Dad coughs & spits.) Peter & I may sound like we're going to die, but I doubt it! I doubt it, because we're not quite through yet. This meeting isn't through, & Peter & Mama & you are not through. So praise the Lord! Hallelujah! Thank You Jesus!
33. You're not getting bored, are you? I'm telling you this story for a reason, to try to cheer you up, so you won't worry about me dying, of all things!--Ha! I think if anybody's going to laugh over my death it's going to be me!--While you guys are standing around crying. I'm going to be sorry for you, but I'm just going to have to have a little laugh, thinking, "Isn't this ridiculous? Here I went & gathered them together for that meeting for most of the morning, to try to cheer them up, & look how much good it did!" Don't I act like I'm having fun right now? (Fam: Yes!) So what are you worried about? If the prophets could go without food or even water for 40 days, why are you worrying about me?
34. I don't know whether I ever told you this or not, but you sure ought to know it. You know there are a couple of words meaning "devil" in the Bible, or "demon," or "evil spirit." Anybody know what they are? (Fam: Diablo, daimon.) Diablo & daimon. And every place in the Bible that it talks about an evil spirit, or a little devil, it uses what word? (Fam: Daimon.) Yes, daimon. But whenever it is talking about Satan himself, it's Diablo.--Which means "the hairy one," by the way! So don't go bragging about your chest hair, boys. Every time I've seen him he looks like that picture on the front of "Persecution as God Sees It!" (ML#2828, GN 537.)--The one where he's really cowering & he's only got a fist on one of her ankles. Did you notice? Are you listening? Still here? (Fam: Yes!)
35. Do you know what Jesus said to Judas?--"Have I not chosen you, & yet one of you is the Devil."--Satan! (John 6:70.) Now don't some of you start feeling guilty or nervous & think I'm talking about you! It has nothing to do with you. Don't let the Devil give you any false ideas. Who else would the Lord trust with that dirty job, & the dirty work Judas was about to do, to betray the Lord? Who else could He have trusted to be sure he took good care of the money?
36. Are you still awake? I know you're reaching your statute of limitations. What time did we start? (Mama: Peter came at ten.) What's the happy medium when we could say that the meeting began? You say, "I got here at 10," "I got here at 11," "I got here at 9!" Well, the Lord will give you credit for whatever time you got here. But if you round that off, we can figure out what the average is. You know, like the story I told you about the old coloured porter & the tip! How many of you remember that one? (Everyone raises their hand!) What do you know! I won't have to tell it again!
37. So hallelujah! What kind of energy do you think I'm running on now? (Fam: Holy Ghost power!) (Fam: Prayer power!) Some people told me this morning that I was going to die! "If you don't eat something you're going to die!" What time was that? (Fam: Maybe 9:30.) And here it is 12:30 & I'm not dead yet! (Fam: Hallelujah! That's our goal.) That's your goal? Why? (Fam: Because we love you.) Oh, me! This whole talk for nothing! I'm trying to explain why you don't need me. Oh well, the only way you'll learn is by experience. So let's go back to my story, those guys who learned by experience.--The leaders at my farewell meeting before I left TSC for Europe.
38. Poor Jethro said, "What are we going to do, Dad? What are we going to do without you?" I said, "Just keep on doing what you're doing! You've still got hippies pouring in here, over 350 now. You're still having classes, you're still having rock music concerts here that are rocking Thurber three miles away!" Talk about rock concerts, we had'm!
39. So I said, "Don't worry, Jethro, it'll be all right." He said, "What are you going to do, Dad? You don't have any money!" I said, "Well, when I was leaving California & didn't know what to do, a drug dealer we'd witnessed to turned around & gave me a thousand Dollars!" I figured I could spend it better than he could, & I guess he did too. He was a real sweet guy up in the hills, & on that money we made it all the way to New York. But as I was leaving TSC, Jeth said, "What are you going to do when you get there? How are you going to get across the ocean?" I said, "Don't worry about it! The Lord will have it waiting when I get there!"
40. It reminds me of that story that Grandmother used to tell about the girl who was going to be a missionary. She told her, "If you really believe it's God's Will, then go down there & wait at the train station & the Lord will supply the money!" And that's about what Mama & I did, didn't we, Mama? Can you imagine Mama & me camping out in a little pup tent, cooking our breakfast over a campfire at Cheesequake Park? We waited & the Lord supplied! We didn't have to have much, a hundred Dollars apiece, that's all, on Icelandic Airlines. Of course, we didn't know what we were going to do after we got to Iceland!--Ha! Nobody laughed! Actually, the plane landed in Luxembourg. We came in on the bus from the airport & I asked the guy at the train station, "Has the train for Calais left yet?" He said, "Oh, it's leaving now, you couldn't catch it!" I grabbed my suitcase & I said, "Watch me!" Some of these guys here thought I couldn't catch it this morning. Well, you just watch me! Okay? You just watch me!
41. Anyway, Lord bless me & help me & strengthen these poor dear people I'm torturing with my life & the fact that I'm not dying. Thank You Jesus! So is everybody still here? Everybody who's still here say "Amen!" (Fam: Amen!) Everybody who's still happy say "Amen!" (Fam: Amen!) It wasn't quite as enthusiastic, was it? Anyhow, I think David & I are having fun.
42. If I can't swallow, why are all you guys praying for me? If I'm never going to be able to swallow again & die tomorrow, what are you worrying about? Huh? You think I'm dying? I can still see. I can still hear better than most of you, from what I've found out. And I can still smell. You don't smell, Honey, I just happened to be looking at you. But I've never seen you go so long without going to the toilet. So any time you guys need to get up & go to the toilet, it's okay. I'll let you go right away.--At 1:30, how's that?
43. So poor Jethro was raising his hands, "Oh, I don't know what to do! I don't know what to do!" I said, "Don't worry about it!" Jethro was worried about what he was going to do without TSC when they finally got their walking papers from Fred & had to go. But pretty soon this multi-millionaire came along who owned a lot of property & a school building in Texas, near Dallas. And before I knew it, he had a bigger setup at the school than we'd had at TSC, with a multi-millionaire financing it & keeping'm running! And he was worried about what was going to happen to him after I was gone!--Ha! It almost makes you laugh when you think about how people get worried about some things, & actually how easy the Lord makes it on them. I'm almost done, I'm trying to get done!
44. Some people I know, they not only worry about tomorrow, they keep worrying about today! "Oh my, what are we going to do today? He coughed again. Oh my, he's spitting up again! My God! What are we going to do? He's dying! Tell everybody he's dying, & that they'd better pray quick or he's going to be a goner!" Do I look like I'm dead yet? Huh? (Peter: You looked pretty bad this morning, but you look pretty good now!) I guess that's what the Apostle Peter thought when he looked at the waves & the water. "Well, Lord, it looked pretty bad this morning, but we're getting along better now."--Ha! Everybody thought I was going to die! (Peter coughs.) God bless you. You sound more like you're going to die than me!
45. So what happened? I've got to wind this story up quick! Mama & I went to London & eventually Israel & Cyprus, & back to the U.S. to straighten out the leadership. And that was when dear Jeth was worrying about that "Chronolog" show. He said, "You've gotta leave the U.S., they're going to have this big media smear!" It was the big first national network smear on us. So we went back to London again, & Faithy was already there, challenging Dr. Blow-Your-Horn (Lord Soaper) & everybody she could. She was fearless! Let me tell you, this Family wouldn't be where it is if it wasn't for Faithy's faith! Give credit where credit is due.
46. I'm losing part of my audience. (Maria: We need to call our new staff member on the intercom & reassure her that you're still alive!) That's good, fine. Well, why isn't she in here with the rest of you? (Maria: We didn't know if you wanted her to come in.) My God, Honey, why not? Of all things! I forgot all about her because she just arrived, & I'm not used to having her around yet. You're letting her miss this? (Maria: It's on tape.) Well, poor girl. I'm sorry. I told you to have everybody come in. So it wasn't my fault. (Fam: She can come tomorrow.) You don't think I could go through this again tomorrow, do you? (Fam: Our daily meeting!) There's a man with a lot of faith! God bless you, Honey! (Fam: I just called her & told her you were doing good & that we'd be there for lunch.) Ha, ha, ha! I'd like her to receive a personal word from me to tell her I'm sorry & that I didn't know she was there! Give me the intercom!
47. Hi, Honey! Well, God bless you! I just want to apologise for them not having you come in here for this very important meeting. But I frankly forgot you were even here, & they said they didn't know whether I wanted you to come. Of course I want you to come! I mean, you're here! Mama says you can come to tomorrow's meeting. Mama has gained a little faith. She figures I'm not going to die today after all. (Mama: I figure if you look forward to seeing her, then you can wait till tomorrow.) Okay, she figures I'll have something to look forward to if I haven't met you yet.
48. Anyhow, I love you, & I'm sorry you didn't get in on this meeting, but as they say, you can listen to the tapes, & maybe that'll be some satisfaction. God bless you! And if nothing else, you can read it. Well, I love you, I'm just sorry you missed all the fun. You missed all the fun of my not dying, at least yet. So God bless you, Sweetheart. I love you. And I've got a lot of hungry-looking people sitting around here. (Fam: She's fixing lunch.) Well, that's what I figured.
49. They thought I was going to die today. They don't seem to know that prophets don't necessarily have to have food. Jesus said so. "Man liveth not by bread alone, but by every Word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God."--Mat.4:4. Thank You Jesus! All right, well, we're getting some Words, aren't we? Amen, hallelujah! My God, what beautiful people we've got, it's terrific! (To new staff member:) I don't know how beautiful you are yet, but I'm sure you must be. Praise the Lord! Well, we love you & we hope to see you soon, or some other time.
50. This is a monumental day & I'm trying to encourage them that I'm not dying yet! The reports of my death have been greatly exaggerated. So, praise the Lord! And I wouldn't be surprised that I might not even die tomorrow. I might not even die today! All I need is a little challenge. And now all I need to do is finish this story, so I can start telling them about my great revelation! You should have seen their faces fall, probably figuring they're going to miss their lunch for sure!--Ha! No, actually they held up really well. Well, I surely can't tell you all about that, but I'm telling you the main thing God wanted you to know, & that is that I ain't going to go yet, God willing!
51. That reminds me of the story about the guy whose wife was down in the barnyard with a bear. They said, "Come on down, farmer, quick! Your wife's down there in the barnyard with a bear!" He rocked his chair a bit, tapped his pipe on the railing, & he said, "Hell no, I won't go! That old bear can take care of himself the best he knows how!" So, praise the Lord! (Everyone laughs.) Can you hear them? They sound like they're enjoying it. Well, it really is a serious meeting & I've gotta wind it up, we've gotta quit, so they can get their little daily duties done. Praise the Lord!
52. You may think I'm silly, but anyway, the Lord's blessed me & kept me going this far, in spite of all my foolishness. Right, Peter? (Peter: Amen!) Right, girls? (Girls: Amen!) Boys? (Boys: Amen, that's right!) Don't we have fun? (Fam: Yes!) And in the meantime the Lord does all the work. We have the fun & He does the work. Praise the Lord? You say, "What do you mean? What do you think I've been doing all this time, Dad? It seems to me like I'm doing a lot of work!" Well, you are! You're all doing a great job & I love you. God bless you & thanks for everything!
53. I'm just telling them the story about how dear Jethro was so worried about us leaving for Europe. Just think, that was September, 1970, & Mama & I took off for Europe & Jeth never collapsed--although I wish Deborah had--& they soon had a big work growing & rolling away, bigger than anything he ever had at TSC. And pretty soon all Europe was rolling, with some of the Family pioneering the East, & others pioneering South America & everywhere!
54. We swept the World because it was God's Work, & nothing's ever going to kill it! Do you hear me? (Fam: Yes, Sir!) So forget this business about dying! Even if the Devil kills me, the Work is not going to die! In spite of everything the God-damned Devil has tried to do, we are still here & still going strong, & I bet we're going to have another Year-End stats that's the best ever!
55. So what! That's the title of this meeting! So what! What are you guys worrying about? So what! It wouldn't matter if I died, & don't tell me it matters! If you say it matters that I die, then it means that you're not really saying that this Work is of God. (Fam: A good confirming verse is where Jesus said, "What is that to thee?" So what? "Follow thou Me."--John 21:22.) Very good, very good!
56. So what! After I left TSC everything was really rolling, & I said, "See, Jeth? Everything didn't collapse!" He said, "Yes, but I've got this problem & I've got that problem & I don't know what to do!" And I said, "So what!" Remember what I told him when I made him that tape from Cyprus? (Fam: "For God's Sake Follow God!") (ML #4.) So what! For God's sake, follow God! He was trying to pour out all these troubles to me on the telephone, of all things! I said, "So what? For God's sake, follow God! Don't worry about it!" Amen? (Fam: Amen!)
57. So, so what! We're still rolling, aren't we? (Fam: Yes.) The Lord's still blessing, isn't He? (Fam: Amen!) Every year I predict, "This is it! This is it!" And what happens? We end up having an even better year. Kind of like what the guy said about, "Cheer up, things could be worse!" So he cheered up, & sure enough, things got worse. The only thing is, I've been saying, "Cheer up, things could be worse," & instead of that, they've gotten better all the time! So what! So what are you worried about?
58. So what? So what if I die? What did Paul tell'm in the Bible? (Fam: "Whether I live or die, I'm the Lord's."--Rom.14:8.) Yes, & what did Gamaliel tell'm? (Fam: "If this work be of God, no man can stand against it."--Acts 5:38,39.) Right! He said, "So what? Don't worry about it!" That's what Gamaliel was saying! "So what! Don't worry about these people! If it be of Man, it will come to nought! So what! If it be of God, no man can stand against it, period!" Even if I die! Is that clear? (Fam: Amen.) Have you got the point? (Fam: Yes, Sir.) Are you sure? (Fam: Yes, Sir.) Are you sure you can say, "So what?" No, you're not sure! Ha! I put'm on the spot & then they shut up like clams!
59. Well, I'm telling you that's what God wants you to say!--That tonight when I choke to death, tomorrow when I choke to death, three weeks from now when I choke to death, or whatever--so what! God's still here! Who do you think is running this thing, anyway? (Fam: The Lord.) All right, then are you going to take it with a "so what"? What does that mean when you say "so what"? (Fam: God's in control.) Exactly! No matter what happens, so what! God's running this thing! This is God's Kingdom! This is God's Work. This is God's Will! Praise God? No matter what happens, are you all willing to say "So what?"
60. I'm putting you on the spot now! I know you're not too excited about it or too willing, but I want you to pledge to me this afternoon, right now, or you're not going to get any lunch, that you'll say "so what!" I'm testing you, like the old drunk cowboy who said to the preacher, "You didn't ask them right when you asked them if they wanted to go to Heaven & everybody raised their hands." He got up on the platform with two six-guns sticking out & said, "Now who wants to go to Heaven?" So that's what I'm doing to you right now! Now who's willing to say "so what"? Am I getting through to you?
61. The next time the Devil says to you, "blah blah blah blah," what are you going to say? (Fam: So what!) The next time somebody tells you, "Dad's dying!" What are you going to say? (Fam: We'll pray for him.) No, I want to hear you say, "So what!", or you missed the whole point of this meeting! (Fam: "We believe, Lord, help Thou our unbelief!"--Mk.9:24.) (Fam: We'll say, "We'll pray, but we'll trust the Lord too.") Well, you're all making qualifications. No matter what happens, even if I'm in Heaven, I want you to say, "So what!" (Fam: We could say, "Praise the Lord!" It's sort of the same.) Right. So what! Come on, let me hear you say it! (Fam: So what!) So what! So what! So what! So what! So what! Which literally means God's Work is going to go on anyhow! God hasn't failed! God's still in Heaven! "God is still on the throne," that was my Mother's theme song, "& He will care for His Own."
62. (Sings:) "God is still on the throne, & He will remember His Own. Though trials may press us & burdens distress us, He never will leave us alone! God is still on the throne, He never forsaketh His Own. His promise is true, He will not forget you! God is still on the throne!" So what! Come on! (Fam: So what!) So what! Can't you say "so what"? (Fam: So what!) (Fam: We can be a "S-WAT" team for Jesus!) Hey, there's a great idea, swat! They've got those SWAT teams all over now. (SWAT = Special Weapons Assault Team.) Don't forget to pray for those poor Davidians. Of all the names for them to pick! They didn't realise how dangerous that name was! So what! Well, they're good candidates for saying "So what!" No matter what happens to them, they could be saying right now, "So what! So what, SWAT!" Okay? Praise God?
63. All right, we'd better quit! Thank You Jesus! I guess you got the point. (Fam: Yes, Sir.)--Or do I have to start over? So what! (To staff member on intercom:) God bless you, Honey, I'm going to have to hang up now. I love you, God bless you & bye bye! In case anybody tells you that I'm dead, what are you going to say? That's really putting you on the spot! Come on, I want to hear you say it! (New staff member responds.) No, that's not what I want to hear you say! When they say I'm dead, she's going to say, "Thank You Lord!" Well, that's fine too. But I want to get the point across here this morning about something. What's the whole idea? You know the Lord will carry on. I want to hear what you're going to say! What's been the title of this whole talk? All right, what are you going to say when they tell you I'm dead? God bless you! She got the point! She's going to say, "So what!" Thank You Jesus! God bless you, Honey! I love you! Bye bye.
64. All right, what shall we do now? We've had our party, we've had our fun, now we're done! I think it would be a good time for the Lord's Prayer. Okay? So what! "Our Father which art in Heaven, hallowed be Thy name. Thy Kingdom come, Thy Will be done on Earth as it is in Heaven! Give us this day our daily bread"--or milk or water or juice or whatever it is--"& forgive us our sins, as we forgive those who sin against us."--Boy, that's a tough one to say! "And deliver us from evil. For Thine is the Kingdom, & the power, & the glory for ever!" SO WHAT! Right?--In Jesus' name, amen! So what! Praise the Lord!
65. What's your problem, Peter? (Peter: Which one?) (Everyone laughs!) I want to hear the answer that I just gave you! (Peter: So what!) Right! (Dad calls out each person's name & they say, "So what!") So no matter what you hear, no matter what happens, so what! Isn't that pretty expressive? It shows you're not going to worry about it. So what! We're going to keep on doing what we're doing! If they're going to martyr us for our faith tomorrow.... (Fam: So what!) If they're going to throw us in jail tomorrow.... (Fam: So what!) If they're going to burn up all our lit tomorrow.... (Fam: So what!) If we're going to run out of money tomorrow.... (Fam: So what!) My God, I started this Family with nothing! That's a little like the Lord: He made the World out of nothing & He hung it on nothing. Pretty good old World, right? It still runs on nothing. So what!
66. When the Devil comes along with this, that & the other & tells you, "We've got no food in the kitchen & we've got no money in the bank, we've got no way to get out of jail," what's going to be your answer? (Fam: So what!) Doesn't that express faith? You've got to have new ideas, new terms to express a difference. All those fancy words in the Bible are fine, but what would you say nowadays? The World's coming to an end! (Fam: So what!) Okay! I'm proud of you! You finally got the point! What are you going to say? (Fam: So what!) What are you going to say when the SWAT teams come to the door? (Fam: So what!)
67. Hallelujah! Isn't that wonderful? I think that's a good talk! Praise God! And you guys thought I was dying! Hallelujah! Praise the Lord! Well, I might die tomorrow! (Fam: So what!) They're getting the point at last! We may run out of money tomorrow! (Fam: So what!) David & Techi may have a tough job tomorrow, I don't know. (Fam: So what!) So what! Praise God? Amen? This poor little boy over here, I run him ragged. (Fam: So what!) It may sound a little hard, but it can yank you out of that feeling that you get sometimes, "Oh my, what could be worse? Everything's going bad!" (Fam: So what!) It's an expression of faith, right? Okay? Praise the Lord!
68. Now you've got a new Family expression! You can all get up & go to lunch & be thankful I'm still alive in spite of whatever anybody tells you. And if they tell you they're convinced that I am dead, like Martha did about Lazarus when she said "Lazarus is dead & he stinks!", what did Jesus say, in essence? (Fam: So what!) I think the Lord really gave me a good idea today! So what! (Fam: Yes, say it to the Devil! Swat him back with it!) So what! We've got our own swat team now! So what! So what, you dirty Devil! God damn you, you dirty Devil! So what! Praise God?
69. Boy, I'll tell you, the Devil sure is on the job lately! I've even seen him a couple of times lately, believe it or not!--Either in my dreams or in my mind when I was rebuking him. I only see him when it's dark, when he's really attacking me. He seems to have to keep his distance. He was as far away as that wall, a few feet at least. The funny thing is, I've always thought of the Devil as being sort of a tall, princely creature with a long cape, like Dracula.--But I was so surprised! He looked like he was only about three feet tall! Although he's often pictured as a satyr, I never thought of him like that, but when I saw him he was half-goat & half-man.--Like that little Devil on the cover of "Persecution as God Sees It!" He was real rough & rugged looking with a big scowl, like he wasn't very happy about being defeated when my swallows went down. So what? Praise the Lord!
70. Are you going to flinch or jerk? What are you going to say? (Fam: So what!) So what! God bless you! I think that's a classic, praise the Lord! So what! And if it's not a classic, so what! Praise the Lord! Thank You Jesus!
71. Lord bless them & give them strength now, & help them to have a good lunch & a good afternoon's rest, in spite of all this "so what"!--In Jesus' name, amen! Praise the Lord! If this thing is of God, so what! If it's of Man, so what! God will take care of it, right? (Fam: Amen!) Okay, thank the Lord! See, the Devil hasn't killed me yet, even though some of you guys thought I was dying this morning! Hallelujah! Thank You Jesus! Praise the Lord!
72. All right, get up, little kids, run along! Don't let me have to beg you to leave. I love you! (Throws a kiss!) I kiss you all goodbye! "Oh, I heard Dad died!" (Fam: So what!) Good boys & girls, that's the stuff! I'm real proud of you! And that's the way it's going to be, amen? You're beginning to learn. Some of you are not very loud yet, but thank God, some of you are learning. Praise the Lord! "Oh, he's dead!" (Fam: So what!) Thank You Jesus! That's what I want to hear you say if you hear I'm dead: "So what!" Praise the Lord!
73. Do you get the point? Why do you think I taught you that? No matter what you hear, no matter what the dirty Devil says, no matter what happens, even if it does happen, what are you going to say? (Fam: So what!) God bless you all! I love you! I'd love to kiss you all. I'm not gone yet, so don't worry about it! So what! So you didn't get to kiss me goodbye. (Fam: So what!) At least you got in on this little talk. All right then, so what! God bless you! I never saw people so slow to go. I think your slogan is, "Hell no, I won't go!"
74. (To David:) God bless you, good boy, I love you! You're wonderful! (David: God bless you! Thank you, that was really inspiring.) I'm glad, I hope it did the trick! (David: It's good Tribulation preparation too.) Praise God! Amen? Good! We've got a new Letter! Thank You Lord!--SO WHAT!

* * * * * * *


More "So What!"
75. A few days ago I invited some of you in to my bedside & I said, "I want to let you know I've been pretty sick, but any rumours of my death have been somewhat exaggerated & I'm not dead yet!--But even if I die today, so what!" That was my message. You're going to go right ahead doing what you're doing, & the Family will continue their great work, winning souls by the hundreds of thousands!
76. Just think, my denomination didn't even want me for a missionary, & they finally didn't even want me to pastor the church I built'm!--But the Lord knew what He wanted me for! Nobody else wanted me but the Lord & the hippies, so I became a missionary to the hippies, & we've won thousands of new missionaries & millions of souls! The Lord was saving me for that task. The reason I never knew what I was going to be or do for fifty years is because the job hadn't been created yet & there was no such thing as hippies yet.
77. When I was a redneck back in Texas we thought hippies were nothing but a bunch of drunks & dopers & commies who ought to be lined up against the wall & shot!--Till my Mother came along & showed compassion for the poor hippies & begged us to go to California & help them, of all things. So I said, "All right, it's okay with me. I'll drive the Teens for Christ out there & we'll see what we can do."--And then I saw those poor lost sheep without a shepherd, & you know the rest of the story. In fact, you were part of it! End of story.
78. No, it's not the end of the story! They may tell you it's the end of the story & "we can't survive this next court case, we're never going to make it another year!" Well, persecution may be popping up all over, but so is publicity! The more we get it, the more we give it. So what! Win or lose, the Lord is going to see to it that He accomplishes what He wants done, & the persecution has actually resulted in more witness than ever! It's resulted in more both good & bad publicity than ever, & the main idea is publicity! That's God's idea!--To publish our news & witness.
79. We've been running from it & hiding from it for years, but now we just figure, "Well, praise God, if that's what the Lord wants, we'll sock it to'm!" If they want to hear all about a sexy group, okay, we're it! They seem to never get tired of sex. Well, neither do we, praise God. And we're at last coming out of the woodwork. We're not ashamed to proclaim it either. It's won us a lot of friends to come out in the open & be exactly what we are! We're not ashamed of being what we are, in fact we're thankful! So praise God, here we are & There we're going, thank You Jesus, no matter what anybody can do! So what!
80. God bless you all! Thank you for your faithfulness! You've had prayer & prayer & prayer, & prophecy & prophecy & prophecy. Now it's time to just stand on it, hold fast, believe it, & expect it! It's going to happen no matter what, & no matter what happens, so what! God's in control! So praise the Lord!

* * * * * * *


Prophecies, Verses & Visions for Dad!
--By WS Staff, 3/93

(Repeatedly, over the last couple of years, the Family worldwide has received many things from the Lord which seemed to indicate that the Lord was going to completely heal Dad as the Family was obedient & continued to give the "meat" of the Word to the World. However, because Dad is now so very ill, to the point where he could go to be with the Lord at any moment, Mama sent a message to one of the Units to ask them to pray & ask the Lord: "Did we somehow interpret these prophecies incorrectly? Is now the time You are going to take Dad Home to be with You?")

Prophecies
"I, the Lord Thy God, am no respecter of persons. The majesty of choice is open to all people. Yea, all My promises are conditional. According to your faith be it done unto you. Whether ye live, or whether ye die, ye are Mine, & throughout your life, ye have in your hands the power of the majesty of choice. The spirit of a man shall sustain him. There is the will to live, & there is the will to die.
"Every day that I give you to live, there are many choices within that day. It is up to you. You are Mine, but you hold your destiny in your hand. But whether ye live or whether ye die, you are the Lord's. I give freely of My promises, but it is up to you what you will do with them, just as I have spoken, that so much is solely dependent upon your prayers. It is according to your faith. I have always put My breast in your mouth, but it has always been up to you whether you would suck or whether you would not suck.
"This is My beloved David in whom I am well pleased, but according to his faith let it be done unto him. For whether he lives, or whether he dies, he is Mine."
* * *

"Have I not promised that I would not suffer you to be tempted above that ye are able, but will with the temptation also make a way to escape, that ye may be able to bear it? For I am a merciful God. The preparation in the heart of Man is of Me, & it is of My still, small voice. For do you think that this David, one of the greatest fighters of all times, would give up the fight if it were not of Me? For I have opened his eyes, & I have spoken to his heart. And as his Grandmother of old did lift up her eyes & say, 'Behold, this is my Coronation Day,' so have I granted to David his heart's desire. For My ways are not your ways, neither are your thoughts My thoughts. For as Heaven is higher than the Earth, so are My thoughts higher than your thoughts, & My ways past understanding. Weep not nor shed tears of remorse, for this should be a day of celebration, a day of rejoicing. For it is not the end, it is only the beginning!"
* * *

"No good thing will I withhold from him that hath walked uprightly before Me all the days of his life. As with the patriarchs of old, for whom I left the day in their hands, so I have done with David. I have left the majesty of this choice with My David, in whom I am indeed well pleased. Whether he will stay with you or come with Me is in his heart & in his hand to do as he will. For he has indeed fulfilled the mission that I have called him to do."
* * *

"Have I not said in times past that before Great Tribulation I would gather David to My bosom? Behold, now he is old, & has borne the trials & tribulations of many years. Now he cannot go forth with his children to battle as he once did. Now ye have seen the works of his labours fulfilled in his children, that they are of age, & they can fend for themselves. Now the choice is his whether to come Home, for there is laid up for him a crown of glory that passeth not away, the mission that shall last forever.
"Behold, even if he goes, he shall not be far from you, for now he is limited by time & place, but then he shall be free to minister to his children all over the World, to lead & guide them in these many battles. For would you keep his flame in one place? Or would you let him be free to minister to his children like he wishes he could? For lo, these many years he has stayed in seclusion so that he could minister to his children by his Words. Oh, how he has longed to be free, but it was not expedient. But now, if it be his desire & his choice, I am calling him Home. And There his works shall be multiplied; they shall not cease.
"Behold, he has prepared these many, many, many years. Now those days of preparation are over. Would you let David go?--Or would you rather he stay here? For you bind him to you with strong cords of prayers & desires. The choice is not only his, but it is yours also. Are you willing to let him go? Are you willing to let him go to his eternal reward? Fear not, My children, for lo, I am with you always, even to the end of the World."
* * *

"For lo, he shall be gathered unto Me with many olive plants beside him, the children that he has loved, the people that he has loved, in due season. For the time & the season knoweth no man, but I know it, & I have reserved it. But I have also put it in his heart to do My Will, & to make this choice, that he may trust & have confidence that his decision is of Me, & that I have given him this choice."
* * *

"In this time of trouble I shall hide him in My pavilion; in the secret of My tabernacle shall I hide him, & there shall we confide, & his wish shall be granted. For he has flourished & scattered abroad the seeds of My Love & My Message. He has been faithful unto death. And if he so wishes, I shall give him the crown of life, laden with stars that shine as bright as the Sun. For abundant are the rewards of My David."
* * *

I received the verse, "The spirit of the Prophet is subject unto the Prophet," in the sense that it's up to Dad whether he wants to let go, or to hang on. I also got very strongly the little phrase that the choice is his, & something to the effect that we can't keep Dad's heart from turning towards Heaven. If he chooses to turn it Heavenward, we can't try to hold it down by our prayers to keep him here. If he does choose to stay with us, the Lord will fulfil all His promises to strengthen him & heal him.
* * *

"Thou therefore endure hardness as a good soldier."--2Tim.2:3. At first I thought, "Well, maybe that's for Dad." And the Lord said, "No, it's for you," because it's harder for us than it is for him. His reward is to go to Heaven. I also thought of the story of Dad's Mother when she was trying to hold on to Granddad in prayer, but then the Lord convicted her that she should let him go.
* * *

I saw a picture of Dad's Grandmother lifting her arms and seeing Heaven open, & saying, "This is my Coronation Day!"
* * *

I got the feeling that Dad was going to go, & the Saints & Angels were all beckoning to him & calling him & waving at him, & they were making great preparations in Heaven for Dad's arrival. It was like everything in Heaven was gearing up for him. And I got the Letter "I Gotta Split" real strongly in this new dimension, that if Dad stays it will be for our sake, but if he leaves it will be for our sake also, & we could have the benefit of his on-the-spot direction much more closely everywhere in the World.
* * *

I got a paraphrase, "Weep not for David, but weep for yourselves, upon whom the ends of the Earth are come."
* * *

I got that love prefers the happiness of others over your own.--And that was really encouraging to me. I really want Dad to be happy, I want him to have the best.
* * *

A couple of weeks ago when we were praying for Dad, I felt like he had one foot on Earth & one foot in Heaven, & that he wouldn't be with us for much longer, like for only a little time. I was thinking how in the Letter "70 Years Prophecy," we interpreted 1993 as the year that Jesus was going to come back. So I thought, "Maybe Jesus is not coming back for all of us this year, but maybe this is the year He's going to come back for Dad." Prophecies are so mysterious, they're like a never-ending mystery.
* * *

During the opening prayer I got the phrase, "The preparation of the heart of Man is of the Lord."--Pro.16:1. And also, yesterday I was reading from 2nd Peter, Chapter one, & I came across these verses: "Yea, I think it meet, as long as I am in this tabernacle, to stir you up by putting you in remembrance; knowing that shortly I must put off this my tabernacle, even as our Lord Jesus Christ hath showed me." (v.13,14.) Also, a couple of days ago, during one of our prayer sessions, I had a vision of Jesus coming down from the Source of Light & Dad going up to Him, walking arm in arm, back towards where the Light was.
* * *

Last week when we were praying for Dad I had that same vision about the Coronation Day. In the vision Dad just lay back real peacefully & said, "Okay, this is it! This is my Coronation Day!" And he was so sweet & happy.
* * *

I got a paraphrase of a verse: "If the believing depart, let him depart." And also, "Except a corn of wheat fall into the ground & die, it abideth alone. But if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit."--Jn.12:24.
* * *

A few days ago on prayer vigil, I was praying desperately for the situation, & I got to a point where I was saying, "Lord, how come You're not doing anything, & how come You're not answering?" I guess in a way He was, & Dad was doing better from time to time. But I felt deeply troubled & I was asking the Lord, "You've promised so much about Dad's healing, yet so little seems to be happening." I'd never felt that way before, but afterwards I felt really comforted because I just believed really strongly that the Lord was going to do something different than we were expecting, & that He had something really special for Dad. So to me that was an answer to prayer, & maybe this is it.
On the other hand, I was thinking of Isaac who was on what he thought was his deathbed & prayed for both Jacob & Esau, but he apparently lived many years longer than he thought he was going to. (See Gen.27, 35:28-29.) (20 years!)
* * *

Over these past days of praying for Dad I've been thinking about how I would feel if he went Home, & the thing I kept getting was how Dad has prepared us so much for this time, & it makes me really thankful that if he does, it's not going to be such a shock. It's not going to be like, "Well, Lord, what are You doing to us? You never prepared us for this, You never told us this was going to happen!" Dad has been preparing us for a long time & encouraging us that the Lord's not going to stop speaking to us & He's not going to stop helping us, & Dad is going to be able to help us even more from the Spirit World. There's the whole "Heaven's Children" Series & we have so much in the Word to prepare us for this time. It just helped me to have a comfort & a peace, that if the Lord does take him, things aren't going to fall apart. We're going to keep going for the Lord! (Amen!)
* * *

The feeling I got from our prophecies is that it's really just Dad's choice. It's like, "Oh yes, Dad, we'd be so happy if you could stay with us." But we bow before our King & we respect his wishes, & know that whatever he wants to do, he's the Lord's. (GBY! Thanks! I love you! He's continuing to keep me!--D.)


Copyright (c) 1998 by The Family