The Family Children of God by insidersChildren of God Family International
Home Chat Boards Articles COG History COG Publications People Resources Search site map
exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #1015

Blaming individuals or the group

Posted by Porcelein Doll (reposted) on May 13, 2002 at 08:57:32:

Let's take the child/adult sexual relations topic for instance.

Many present family members will say when you bring up this topic, "Blame should be on the individual, stop placing it on the group, the group isn't responsible."

How true is this and how far does it extend?

On one hand I believe that molesting children is definitely a problem with the individual, even in the Letters Berg made it clear to do things in love (though admittedly, the letters were used to "force" one into cooperating with the "forcer"'s personal desire). But on the other hand, in the case of abuse, is the fact that Berg opened the door to it and seemingly promoted it in his writings also to blame for the line crossing, esp. in regards to molesting and forcing?

But what in the cases of mutual relations between the two age groups? Where is the line of right and wrong and how much can be blamed on the group or on the indivudal?

Let's say a good guy, around 30 or so, has a sexual relationship with a very well-developed and mature 14-year old, it is mutual and both parties are very fond of each other. Let's say that for more than a decade his "brainwashing" (for lack of better word) has been that sex with minors is ok if done in love, let's say that in his present situation this is the new push and being encouraged by the top leadership, and mixing his male desires along with yieldedness to comply with the new direction, how much of the situation blame is to be put on the individual or the group.

I mean, I am imagining a few actual incidents I know about, and if these were brought to a court of law, would the judge or jury look deeper into the background of the group and give leeway to the offender, taking all circumstances into account, or would the individual receive full blame for what amounts to statutory rape?

Any comments?

On a note, I would freak as a mother to know if my daughter was having sex with someone out of her age braket, esp. at the ages of 16 or under. Perhaps after 16 I would be a little more understanding, depending on the circumstances. But I feel 14 or younger is a rather tender age and that such relations should be avoided or kept within your age group. But remember back to what the Family and even the world was like 15 years ago or more.