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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #2131

My daughter's anger... she tells me how she feels and I listen.

Posted by MG on July 18, 2002 at 00:56:58:

In Reply to: Another excellent post posted by Acheick on July 17, 2002 at 10:55:56:

The other nite I was talking to my daughter by phone and she expressed that frustration of not having had the choice of being a Family member, whereas I did. Sometimes she's angry, sometimes she's confused and frustrated. She has plenty to be outraged about due the varying types of abuse she suffered growing up in the F. So when she vents her anger on me I take it, I listen. I appreciate the fact that she's willing to communicate it to me. She could be completely shutting me out and not have the least to do with me, even a phone call; my attitude to that would be that that's what I deserve. So I consider my being able to still communicate and have contact with my daughter as an undeserved gift. I accept what she tells me when she says I was extremely insecure to have ever joined the Family in the first place, and that I was insane to have stayed in the Family so long. I don't argue. In fact I said you need to be angry at me and deserve to feel the way you do. I encourage her to express it. I hope it's helpful to her. We can't go back into the past and change the decisions we made. So any SGs that are willing to communicate let's make plenty of space for them to vent their feelings no matter how offensive it may seem to be, depending on our attitude it can be therapeutic to both parties. And for the SGs that completely shut the door to any and all dealings with us FGAs it's our part to respect their position.

I think this is excellent subject to keep regularily posting on.