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In Reply to: I think you're missing the point posted by Acheick on August 21, 2002 at 00:34:01:
No, I wouldn't say I would pat them on the back and say 'It's OK now...'
But, is there ever a time that these people can be sorry for things? What do we in the ex-community expect of them? Can present Family people realise that some things in their past were a mistake, can they change their ways and can they continue living their lives in the Family? Or do we expect them to:
- totally deny the Family and their life in it
- leave the group and denounce it
- denounce their years of what may have been true service for the Lord
Something that concerns me is it seems there is no room here for the possibility of 'good' Family members. Maybe I am altruistic, I try to see good in people no matter who or what they've done. I have my lines, esp. when it comes to children. But if I know that someone who is in the group has never crossed those abusive lines, have tried to be good, though not perfect, people, why shun them?
I may be wrong, but according to whose standards? One thing I have learned over the past 2 years is that there is no 'right' and 'wrong' standard. There is individual standards, what is right to one person, one ethnic group, one religious group, may be very very wrong to another, and vice-versa. Which is why I draw my personal opinion of right and wrong at certain clear lines and try to allow people to live their lives according to their standards. I personally don't believe in a lot of things, but I try not to judge another person as bad or push them away from me if they do believe in or practice those things.
It would seem to me that if we want religious freedom, we have to be fair and allow others that freedom as well. Is there a possibility that the Family could be investigated by an outside force, guidelines laid down, international monitors to ensure they follow those guidelines, and the Family could continue to operate? Even in a court of law noone can take away one's personal freedom of religion. Even if the Family were taken to court for their beliefs, the court would never be able to stop the individual from believing it.
As a group, as an organization, I would prefer to see the Family shut down, members freed from the control, but the adult members have chosen that way of life, they are not victims, they decided to be there. And they have the right to bring their children up in that society and lifestyle.
Their children have the right to leave when they are of age, which many of them have done and are doing. And the parents have to live with the results of their choices, their kids who hate them, their kids who have a hard time adjusting into society, their kids who are athiest and hate the Family and religion. This is the result of the parents' decisions. Time works itself out and things come full-circle.
I would wish parents wouldn't bring their children up in the Family, but when it comes down to it, it's their choice, and as such they have to live with the responsibility and results of that choice.
