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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #6210

I apologize for my "people like Ray" comment

Posted by Thinker on December 06, 2002 at 18:19:15

In Reply to: ray posted by ray on December 06, 2002 at 17:36:38:

I said it not out malice, or with the intention of grouping you in some category. On the contrary, I said it to validate an important viewpoint coming from a person whose input I respect. It was clumsy of me, and I could have said it better. It resembled "talking about a blind person like he wasn't there," but it wasn't the intention. I had hoped you would jump in and add to the discussion.

About the issue of posting using anonymous names, it's just rhetoric to me. We are ALL pretty anonymous to each other here. I have no idea who you are or where you are, and can never tell 100% what you mean by reading your writing, sans the benefit of body language and other verbal intonation and cues. (It's hard enough in real life.) How do you know that I haven't already posted information openly about myself and my mistakes? I ask the same what do YOU know about me? If I choose to post now as Thinker, a handle I have used for some time now, it is my prerogative. You are implying that I have something to hide just because I don't use "John," "James" or "Peter?" Are you implying you are of better standing because you have only posted in your real name? (Is it really your real name? I have no clue!)

No, I will never know what it feels like to own up to all those things you said because I'm not you and I'm bsy enough facing the consequences of my own life choices, but I do know what an antagonistic atmosphere it is on the boards. I am surprised you found me antagonistic and took swipes at me, lumping me into some strange category of anonymous trouble-makers, posters of lesser standing. I have been bringing up similar points to yours for discussion, and haven't felt for the most any animosity towards you. As far as I know I haven't posted anything of the like either. There is a saying, "you teach best what you most need to learn."

The thing I do take issue with in this post of yours is the persecution complex. You shared you viewpoint. Even though it was what seems to be a minority view, it was getting respect and acknowlegment. It was being validated and discussed. Now you feel like people are not treating you like a human, not picturing you as one when posting, not respecting you, and you are handing out advice about how to post, and you are saying it is masochistic for even trying to communicate here. I found that offensive, and weak on your part.

Did you have to write "Thank God,(if i am allowed to do that here..)??"

My hats off to you for confronting F. leadership before getting kicked out, speaking truth, having a family, voluneering for helping "exmems of highcontrol groups", writing your story, looking into question on movingon.org, and growing tomatoes.