In Reply to: Re: Jules, what did you mean by this? posted by Jules on January 16, 2003 at 15:42:44:
I recently had a chance to personally see and talk with my older SGA daughter who is very much "in" TF. This was at a family reunion, so the rest of us who've left TF were there too, along with my mom and the rest of our clan, uncles, aunts, cousins, etc.
As Jules says about the SGAs she communicates with, my daughter did not refute various issues on abuses as "all lies".
But it wasn't until I showed her that I respected her personal rights to make her own choices, that the communication became more fully genuine.
I have to say that my mom stood up for my daughter's rights to make her own choices, that the rest of us who've left TF should not criticize and attack her and her decisions to remain a member.
I really had to take stock in what my mom said, the wisdom of the matriarch, who's been through it all, especially multitudes of worries and disappointments and suffering, for the many years I stayed in TF, and brought my kids up TF, something she didn't agree with at all. (At one point, she took in our son who left in '96 not long before he was 16, he lived in her house and went to high school, and soon he'll be graduating from universtity with degree in computer science.)
So here's a mother/grandmother who's been through the wringer with all kinds of shennanigans my sisters, brother & I put her through. So when she told me that we should cut some slack to her grand daughter who's still in TF, I had to respect it. So if that goes for my daughter, than I guess it should go for other SGs that are still in the Family, and a lot of FGs too.
I'm not partial to the dismantle TF campaigns. I agree with Jules, there's concerns that take priortiy, and I really think that if my daughter does one day decide to pursue a career and interests outside TF, it won't have been our criticisms, but the respect we learned to show her, the person, that contributes to it.