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My part of testimoy (asked by David C ) repost

Posted by on March 23, 2003 at 05:21:52

That's true I didn't say much about my personal weakness mistake to have joined the cult David C. but here it is to read if you want! :

Judgemental towards others I am you say?... Not much I believe. Just against the cult much as you know and trying as much as I can as you saw to try to tell all to forget all of it forever as all habits and wrong schemes we have learned in it and all its dangerous "crap"...

I did a strong mistake too joining the cult and pray Jesus Christ since a long while to erase that part of my life to progress faster now. I joined in Spring 1974 in Montreal North, a big "colony" there then and I see myself as a weak "sheep" needing company more then in my life as others more than anything else. Community life attracted me as some kind of comfort but really soon I found out that it wasn't as nice place as it was at first sight.

Many young couples were separated a really long time to supposedly see God's will in their couple lives first, but surely too long time and the so-called "sheperds" were much "mean" and really harsh sometimes when you opposed them and their authority... These "sheperds" had no qualification at all to train the youth as we know now! I even became sheperd a few times in different places myself but was too soft compared to the others. I was myself concentrating on witnessing and pushing the guys and girls to do so always much and since that was working, people were happy.

But as I was doing good, they sent me to become a young sheperd in Toronto, but then there I met the big crap sheperding hiding in their rooms not seeing their activities much in the big home there and hated that and left.

To come back to when I joined, I had some experiences before joining in my life where, as many young ones, I was searching for the truth. Being raised Catholic and having left church since a while, I always loved Jesus though in my heartand was searching somehow the Truth somewhere. Part of the Catholic training has been good, but part of it was lukewarm and didn't attract me much. I didn't know about Salvation much either then. So joining the cult, I received Salvation I agree. But the fact I had to deny family links as much as I could as the sheperds wanted and the attitude there, it grew in me a bad feeling against my relatives that they were "out" to say the least as not respecting my cult choice. But I see now my parents were right to freak out and I was wrong all those years as I see now I became an extremist, which is as we realize it now dangerous much... I could have witnessed better with giving better follow-ups in another Christian stronger assembly.

I really regret not to have met then some other Born-Agan Christian movement's member to receive Salvation too and become a good sane Christian instead of having been seduced by evil after a short Salvation scheme whatever true but with weak strange follow-up.

Community life was attracting too, so many felt less lonely as often loneliness is present as young adult. That was another seducing strong danger much. We were getting off "reality" and going away from real life more and more all in there and that's one danger and one of the really bad sides of a cult as we see in the Hare Krishnas, Moonies, etc. that they recruited the same way too.... It takes years and years after to get rid of that "false" security spirit and as I see here in some, some didn't get rid of it yet as searching in ex-members' fellowship still a false sense of security somehow, see?

All that to say that I should just have refused to see in a girl smile the answer to my search when I crossed in a subway station a cult disciple as I should have realized that she was brain-washed then as I became fast too, not knowing what I was doing much anymore being too innocent to balance things out and see the hided bad part of it being too young to realize things right.

I remember now witnessing in the streets that those who refused my literature (where strange things were said much as End of the Wold's 40 days warning, etc.) weren't evil or bad people as I thought now hehe! But they were just "wiser" people refusing a cult member offer, saner people than I was they were then refuse smartly a cult approach from the brain-washed guy I was who joined community life just because it was more enjoying than to fight in real life to maintain a normal job or so...

Now I look at the future and I'm happy not to try to depend on others or groups or anything that can hinder my freedom. To learn to become stronger by personal initiatives searching for the good tools is my most important priority always, and seeing the enormous dangers of the cult as even still the dangerous activities of some, I say some, ex-members now maintaining the same habits they had in the cult, it makes me become so in need to be exposing all that hurt us so much openly... I could go on and on to expose so many things I saw, especially manipulation from the leadership I know well in Europe and elsewhere in the cult as I've been sheperd and lived with the Show group Children of God's cult band some time in France, etc... but I keep it for the policemen... If somebody asks here though, I could go on somehow. I'm happy myself I never became having the harsh sheperd attitude, in fact I wasn't that group style of counselors and never fit in their guru adoration pattern much and that's why they didn't like me as others here as we knew something was wrong and didn't lick the king or queen asses ourselves.

To finish though, I realize now that the "under-the-table" illegal activities of the cult weren't good for me and didn't feed my soul right to progress in life in a real Christian way. In fact I see now that right from the beginning, David Brandt Berg's influence, that is the founder and leader of the group's one as the influence of the actual queen and king as a fake non-qualified leadership attitude, being doing illegal activities themselves, came into me as an horrible influence all from the top of the pyramid-style cult as bad evil stuff to keep me away from a "real" Christian life, see?... That is their "fake passports" fleeing patterns style, etc... The dark side of the cult just didn't not respond to heal my rebellious young adult attitude towards life but brought it to become worse. I see it clearly now. Staying in the real day to day life pattern and having been saved by another saner honest witnesser would have been a lot better and that is why I witness still always to give the youth I meet a good vision of Christianity now without manipulation or fake community life... Now I can become an "honest" man more and embark the Honesty pattern of real life sane life citizens of this World whatever injustices there are around...