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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #15948

You're damned right I'm back

Posted by Grandpa's Ghost on November 11, 2004 at 19:56:17

In Reply to: Re: Abrahim! protect us from the Vandari!! posted by Jewlz on November 11, 2004 at 16:35:12:

I'll tell you one thing right now, this new court case in Australia is going to really show what the Family's made of. And of course, god will judge the Australians for how they treat the Family too. If they reject us, well, god will judge them. I wouldn't be surprised if that's why ninety percent of Australia is desert right now. You mark my words, they rejected the Family in the past and they were turned into a desert.

(Maria: Was that way back in the beginning when Hong Kong Goolagong and the Aborigines emmigrated to Australia?)

Isn't "Goolagong" the name of a city in Australia?

(Maria: I don't know. But yes...I think it's the capitol. I'll check an atlas.)

And what the hell can you expect of a place where they have a guy named Crocodile Dundee for their Prime Minister?

(Maria: Oh look! Melbourne is the capitol---)

And what's the national anthem? "Waltzing Matilda"? What an inane joke! The whole place is a joke! And speaking of "hole places" didn't I warn the Family not to go to Black Holes?

(Maria: Yes sir.)

So what are they doing in Australia? Huh?

(Maria: Well, it does rain in a few places on the east coast, so--)

And what the hell is the Family thinking to get caught in ANOTHER court case there? Huh? What the hell are they thinking? Can you imagine the stupidity? Taking on the Vandari this time? Stupid! Stupid!

(Maria: I thought you said recently that Abrahim and his gypsies and all Ghengis Khan's mongols were going to help us win this court case. Oh, by the way, the capitol of Australia is Sydney, I think. Look here in the atlas--)

(Grandpa bats the atlas out of Maria's hands.) Sure! Oh, Abrahim's going to help the kids! Pied Piper's going to help them! Sure! Fat lot of good they're going to do us when the caca hits the ventilation system! I'll tell you right now, the best damned thing the Family in Australia can do is cut their losses and run!

(Maria: They already did that when they blamed you for the sex stuff.)

WHAT??

(Maria: Ooops ... I meant ....)

(Grandpa slaps his foolish handmaid.) Stupid woman! Let me tell you! I never take that from a woman! I slapped my first wife when she sassed me back, and I'm not going to take that from you either!!

(Maria: I didn't mean to say---)

Damn it, woman! No wonder our enemies call you a wicked Witch! And to think, I left you in charge of the Family. I must've been out of my mind! What was I thinking? I shoulda left Peter Pecker in charge.

(Peter Pecker: Yes sir, that's right sir.)

You HEAR that, son?

(Peter Pecker: Yes sir, that's right sir.)

You got that, son? From now on YOU'RE in charge!

(Peter Pecker: Yes sir, that's right sir.)

Oh great. Just great. I'm surrounded by morons. Peter the Parrot has just inherited the mantle of David.

(Maria: I found it. Victoria is the capitol of Australia.)

What?!

(Maria: Oh wait, I see. The atlas is upside down. The capitol is actually Perth.)