Reader Survey on ML980

I've been analyzing Berg's "Hong Kong Goolagong" today for an article at xfamily.org. This has got to be one of the funniest MLs I've ever had the misfortune to read and consider. I got to wondering what FGAs who were around in 1982 thought about this bizaare, hilarious ML when it was published.

I realize that some folks on this website reached their limit when they couldn't get Berg to do the math of a 1,500 square mile pyramid inside the moon, but God's end-time prophet was clearly showing signs of dementia long before he decided math didn't matter.

In the interest of social science, I devised the following open-ended survey about you memories of Hong Kong Goolagong.

Please choose one of the following responses, and elaborate as you see fit.

When I first read "Hong Kong Goolagong: Battle of the Bosoms", I thought:

1) The last time I smoked crack was six months ago. I'm really happy Jesus allows me to get "high on the Most High" through the visions of God's end-time prophet.

2) Thank you Jesus! I praise You for revealing the truth about demons with big boobs who attack Christian missionaries. I can really use this prophetic revelation in my prayer life as I prepare to preach the Good News to the natives of Papua New Guinia.

3) A spiritual battle with smothering bosoms? Didn't Woody Allen do a plotline like in "Everything You Ever Wanted to Know about Sex but Were Afraid to Ask"--?

4) Oh that Mo--He's such a wild and crazy guy! I feel really priviledged to be in God's End-time Army and following someone who breaks my bottle and challenges my prideful tendency toward rational thought.

5) I don't have time for this. I've got 4 kids and another on the way. I could tell Mo a thing or two about choking on nipples.

6) What's the deal with Maria? For the Family's official "wine taster", she doesn't have a clue about quality control.

7) I wish I was Maria and could be there when Dad gets these prophesies. But I'm not sacrificial or spiritual enough to suckle at David's breast like Maria and the others in the royal household. Maybe if I tried harder to be a yielded, revolutionary woman...

8) I can't listen to this....arghhhh.....I rebuke you Oplexicon in Jesus' name!...I've got to stop pulling out my pubic hairs one by one....save me Lord!...maybe Sister Sweet Lips will minister to me tonight...where's the sharing schedule?

9) Why did WS decide to make this a DO Mo Letter? I could get some serious scratch distributing this around the Hong Kong bars and brothels. With Eman's awesome illustration of hot, demonic tits at war, I could really move the message to hungry, sheepy sailors on shore leave.

10) What's up with bashing Oz? Did the Unit get deported? Hmmm...should tell the colony shepherd the Lord is leading me to go back home to Sydney?

11) Do my parents really believe this stuff, or is this a game of pretend?

12) Other: (Please describe what went through your head the first time you heard Goolagong)___________________________________