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Re: A few thoughts

Posted by ray on November 02, 2005 at 10:36:16

In Reply to: A few thoughts posted by CB on November 02, 2005 at 09:35:27:

it would be hard to argue w/ the fairness of the points you raised. but i guess it comes round to what one hopes to accomplish thru dislog. you are right that in the context of this sort of exmem forum, james got exactly what was to be expected. yet it also seems true that little was accomplished in terms of any real communication or exchange of ideas. everyone believes pretty much what they did before, but now w/ a little more reinforcement. expectations were in fact realized... guess what? family members often think like family members.

however, it is hard not to feel a little disappointment that whenever someone who appears to be at least willing to question some family teachings goes as far as to reach out, even if in a challenging way, to test the waters of conversation across the "great divide", that the wisdom that most of us would probably try to apply in a face-to-face conversation, in hopes of introducing another perspective into the possible ways a group member might try looking at an issue, is rather drowned out by the emotions of exmems who kind of krakatoa whenever they are reminded of the mindset of denial that is so prevalent w/in the group.

i don't know if there is a way to avoid this. we see it more and more in society these days... talk shows that are really only pep rallies for those who already agree w/ us etc. still, wouldn't it be nice if there were a forum where folks such as james could be offered new ideas w/o triggering the sort of reaction he encountered? i'm not trying to blame anyone for anything... just thinking out loud.