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There's no winning this one

Posted by CB on May 17, 2006 at 17:19:45

In Reply to: Re: Context is Everything posted by Deb on May 17, 2006 at 09:15:09:

Keep in mind the context of my post. I was talking directly to Moonshiner, who appears to have formed a very low opinion of you, and I was contrasting Buckley's use of the word "bitch" when I used the word "brat". In that context, the worst thing I could think to say about you is, OK, she may have acted like a snarky brat, but... I guess it does get at the definition of a word. To me, "brat" is a somewhat endearing term. Certainly beats "bitch" in my lexicon.

And yes, I think you can be a bit tiresome with your demands for attention. Example: Why couldn't you just let my post to moonshiner pass without a challenge? People on this board have had different perceptions of your behavior as a communicator. I've been among the more favorable in my assessment and have spent a great deal of time & energy arguing for a balanced, compassionate view of you and your father. So does my labeling you a brat actually make you a brat? Call me a pompous ass if that's what you think of my behavior. Labeling me as a pompous ass doesn't make me one, just as labeling you a brat isn't what makes you behave in a way that I perceive flippant and immature.

I put myself in other people's shoes all the time. When I was writing my response to Moonshiner, I thought, "I wonder if Deb will read this, and if she does, whether she will be offended?"

Then I thought, "So what if she gets her panties in a twist?" One rule I play by is quite simple: If you dish it out, be prepared to eat it. You have dished out a fair amount of flippancy in your responses to people on this board. A statement like, "I'm just here to mess with your head" is fairly insensitive, don't you think?

I realize that people raised in TFI have a long history of being patronized and condescended to by adults. I try to be sensitive to that history and those triggers, but there are times I get tired of walking on eggshells and feel the need to say, "Oh, grow up!" Those times usually arise when someone's smart-alecky, petulant tone has gotten on my last nerve.