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Re: Personal space

Posted by on November 29, 2006 at 14:18:53

In Reply to: Re: Personal space posted by Closing up on November 28, 2006 at 18:19:58:

Closing up said:

"Wow. Thanks for sharing your personal journey.
I don't mean to be rude, but I couldn't quite get anything out of what you wrote. After a few sentences I had to resist jumping to another post, but I forced myself to read it and finally did it in 5 sittings, because I thought it was very gracious of you to reply. It was just a lot more than I asked for. I'm about the same age so it doesn't have anything to do with it. I don't mean to tell you how to write, but it was far too lengthy and scholarly, and veered away from what I was asking. I don't see why it was necessary to write all that, talk about power seeking individuals you met, quote cult experts, discuss scripture, name all those people and places, when you could have said it in 2 sentences: "On leaving I was still into communal living for a while because I was involved with a Jesus People type movement, but now I'm not. I got tired of being taken advantage of by people I meant to help.""

Well, maybe something between 2 sentences and what you wrote would be great. Sorry if I'm offending you with this.

“Closing up”:

Wow, back actcha! Please, try detaching a bit and re-read what you just wrote.

Yes, I shared some personal journey stuff. I haven’t posted here for awhile. Sorry about your attention span—I used to take Ritalin for that! Har.

My understanding is that posts are optionally either short OR long, depending on the individual ANSWERING. A string is pretty much understood to be an expansion on an original idea, and the “unwritten social contract”, if you will, is understood to be politeness, forbearance, and sensitivity; like meeting people in public for the first time, getting to know them, and so forth.

I’m still learning, but your response here, if given, say, at a public Christmas party, where people may not know each other, would have been the, yes, offensive response; like sighing loudly, looking at your watch and tapping it, and sighing again, after only pretending to ask an actual question, with the expectation of an actual answer. Your answer felt like a "sucker punch"; frankly.

Sorry, but of course I am offended. Who wouldn’t be? A social masochist?

Perhaps in your next “general public question”, you should be more specific with your expectations, and give instructions for the answers you actually would approve of—just a suggestion.

I merely thought that my experiences and point of view might actually be interesting; to you AND others.

I gave you MY answer, not yours.

Yes, I DO think you’re telling me how and what to write; but that’s OK.

Don’t be such a controlling “Grinch”, and have a Merry Christmas!