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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #30844

Re: Judging them

Posted by sia nara on June 01, 2008 at 21:17:20

In Reply to: Re: Judging them posted by Passing on May 23, 2008 at 23:29:28:

I don't know how you perceive that I somehow blame Rick for what his mother, step-monster and others did to him.
first of all, I left when the first letters were coming out (like "My Little Fish") because when women were first exploited and turned out and it was evident that Berg's shit was rolling downhill, I could not handle it having been molested as a child before ever encountering COG.
So I don't feel the need to beat myself up or be ashamed. But I can be empathic.
Further, there is a point where people who have been victimized stand at crossroads of confronting their perpetrators or confronting the abuse with the help of therapists and supporters.
The law is slow and the way COG/TF operates, made it impossible to get ahold of any of the top members so far.
I never supported or participated in pedophilia and I feel GOOD about myself that I didn't even though I felt like I was going against God at the time, to be repulsed to the hilt about what Berg was doing.
Just after leaving I was in contact with people who were working with law enforcement with regards to cults, and I confirmed the "My Little Fish" letter was from TF. Since this was pretty new, and Rick was still a toddler when I left, neither my kids experienced combos or jumbos and I never lived around Berg. I did live in Denmark for a time where child pornography was legal, at least at that time. Anything went there. But the family in DK was not participating in anything like this yet!
There was no judgement implied in my post towards Rick. Just the hopes that others that have been so badly abused will seek other routes for as long as it takes to get beyond any plans to kill either themselves or anyone else.
I hate to see that happen to so many.
That's beyond tragic.
I love what the sisters from England did, who were also severely abused and separated from their family as so many others who weren't from well known families within have also suffered.
They wrote a book and told their story. If anything, they left plenty out and under-exaggerated I am sure. But it takes having survived that cult holocaust, whether as a tricked out woman, a burnt out man, a kid born in, an adult surviving and out now, to realize just how incredibly BAD it was.
If you were close to someone abused, I think you should take your guilt up with them personally. If you already have, and you have been forgiven or at least validated their experience, then good for you.
But you are not the collective conscience for every person that ever got sucked in and spit out by Berg.