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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #1133

Re: Hi Mekka - sleepless nights

Posted by Charlie on May 29, 2002 at 13:20:28:

In Reply to: Re: Hi Mekka - sleepless nights posted by Mekka on May 28, 2002 at 09:48:11:

How long has this been going on?

Anxiety will keep you from falling asleep, like being anxious over that hand operation, for example. Depression, over something, will wake you from sleep, usually in the wee hours of the morning. If depression wakes you up, anxiety can kick in and keep you up at the same time. 2 hits, for the price of one.

I went through ten years of that, waking up in the wee hours, until my grief in coming out of the cog got resolved. There was a goodbye there that I was having to make and I didn't know it. Once the goodbye was made, sleep came easy. My health returned too.

Depression can be caused by lots of things, other than Cog grief, though. Any unresloved anger, about anything, can be turned inward - depression is anger turned inward. Finding the right target for the anger usually will unstop the blockage.

I had to learn that it was ok to be angry and, more importantly, to be able to confront the source of the anger if it was safe to do so. That includes: God, leaders, mates, bosses, kids, circumstances and conditions, and even myself.

Poor health or threatening health conditions can bring on depression too.

The "if only" stage of the grief process preceeds true grief. We all do it. "If only I hadn'ta done this, if only I hadn't a done that!" The thing is you did, whatever it was, and when that's accepted, true grief (and tears) can flow. Once true grief is flowing, resolution and forgivenss aren't all that far behind, unless of course you decide to take it back and hold on to it - the anger. True grief goes nowhere under that condition. Forgivenss is love's toughest work and has, as always, been a choice.

Forgive me for preahing!