In Reply to: A civilized talk about the underlying issues posted by Exer on July 25, 2002 at 19:32:34:
I read the original post by (Micron?) the 'quote of the week' which was Joseph's, and I imagine this quote came from NDN, but just reading the quote by itself, not with any other surrounding opinions, I didn't see the big deal and why there was such a rage over it:
"People don't become good just because they leave The Family, and they don't stay evil just by staying. But, the belief that they do all comes from the same mindset."
I mean, I have to agree, people are not automatically good cause they leave the group, and neither are they automatically evil just cause they stay. I thought about what Joseph meant by 'all comes from the same mindset' and what I think is this:
When we were in the group we (or at least me maybe) were very close-minded in our thinking:
"We are in this wonderful group, we are good, we are the best...(more self-righteousness)" and so to be out of the group, if I continue the same thought pattern of automatically labelling a person because of their belief system or whatever, aren't I just as self-righteous as when I was in the group?
Some may argue that the group is evil in itself, esp. in the areas of child abuse, but I believe we have come to an agreement that the group has taken steps to change and eradicate that problem, so now I would say that the group is really strange, I mean, people can masturbate to Jesus if they want, they can live communally, they can homeschool their children, it's a free world and it's their choices and decisions right?
So, are all Family members evil just cause they stay in the group? And does that mean that we were evil too cause we were all there once upon a time, we all were part of the group, every one on this board could have never joined if they chose, could have left years earlier than they did, but decided for some odd reason to stay. Do we automatically label those still in as evil? Deluded maybe, a bit crazy maybe, insane perhaps, we don't understand how they can give up their freedom, their individuality, their lives, but they have and so don't we need to respect that as much as we desire their respect for our choices? Isn't it a two way street.
On the same hand, I know several ex-members who are real whakos, nuts, not good people at all. They use others, they hurt others, they are not the type of person I would associate myself with, although I have on right to call them evil, I wouldn't consider them 'good' just cause they chose to leave the group.
Like I said, maybe I missed something here, but I think Joseph was right in his quote, people aren't good just cause they leave the group, neither are they evil cause they stay, I for one really have no right to make a judgement like that.