The Family Children of God by insidersChildren of God Family International
Home Chat Boards Articles COG History COG Publications People Resources Search site map
exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #7148

How I look at this

Posted by Donny on January 24, 2003 at 16:08:48

In Reply to: I have thrown away my yardstick.... posted by goth88 on January 24, 2003 at 15:31:33:

Goth, good post and thanks for sharing your thoughts, and I think that each one of us will look at this slightly differently because we were all in different head spaces in the Family, had different positions, etc. and therefore come out having to deal with different issues. Your issues are relatively simple and you can be so thankful for that.

I also tend to not believe in "collective guilt," ie that the entire FGA population, en toto, has a blanket of guilt thrown over them. For example, while I can see the point in the statement, "Anyone who tithed was guilty because they were an enabler of the evil system," I think that even if we do validate that view that we can deal with it and move on. Some people won't even see that as a valid issue, but for those who do take ownership of this, repent of it and admit they are wise and move on, well, it doensn't have to be a millstone they carry around their neck forever.

There are other more specific issues that individuals have to deal with (depending on their position in the cult) that are far more pending. For example, a leader who pushed the breaking up of marriages and was responsible for working over SGAs in a victor camp is not going to spend a lot of time flagellating himself or herself for having tithed. To do so would be to miss the key issues, that they were individually, personally resonsible for abuse, crimes or oppressive policy and must specifically atone for those.

I applaud people like you, MC and Achieck (and many others I am sure) who have dealt with the issues, made things right with those they have hurt (your children) and have been forgiven and restored and who can move on to healing. I do believe there are many others who bear more responsibility (some a LOT of responsibility) who will take longer to come to that place.

Healing is an onward journey and we are all at different places on that road. I'm thankful for the healing and restoration in my own life and other ex-members I know, and feel that taking responsibility for the past is what is liberating.