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exFamily.org > chatboards > genX > archives > post #13222

tough decisions

Posted by Passing By on May 12, 2004 at 07:58:51

In Reply to: Re: good questions posted by anovagrrl on May 12, 2004 at 06:33:46:

I used to work with this sweet couple right before leaving (1984). In my heart I know that the husband could see some of the terrible things coming up but they were in a difficult position to do that, it was much easier to stay. They had it made, on a way, while I didn't. I was disposable, they weren't, plus their record was not as bad as mine.

After many years they are still part of the same machinery, probably doing the same type of things and bringin in the sheeves to burn for Maria and Peter. It is still far easier to stay than to leave.

These are the "old folks" now who keep the cogs oily. Peter and Maria are not the only ones to want the status quo to continue but these nice "old folks" some of us still pitty and may even care for.

Can they see the crap they work with? Probably but "the incredible power of the ego defense mechanisms called denial and rationalization" keeps them from doing anything. The doctrines already in place, the procedures already inplace, the structures already in place have too much momentum and will not change. The Family will not change as a whole but individuals can ahcnge.

It is the same situation as a band of Christian gypsies trying to change the system. We knew that we couldn't change it so we went out witnessing and doing it one by one. We cannot change the system, not even one individual. The system cannot be changed, only one individual at s time. The Family has became the system and will not change either.

All that can be done is work on each individual we can work with, one by one, and show them by example. The "old folks" (in general) will not do it, there is no hope for them, the only possibility of the kids.

Do not trust anybody who is over 25. (ha!)