How can I help her?

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Posted by on January 29, 2011 at 21:57:21

The girl that I love grew up in a cult. She ran away in her late teens to start a new life. Now she is between 25-30. I knew that she would be socially different (no standard work experience/schooling, irresponsible, distrustful, self centered) but I didn't think much of it before. But after a few months of knowing her I realized that she is still haunted by her past. Now I'm trying to understand what's going on but it's hard to get through to her.

I've read a few things on wikipedia and some testimonials on sex abuse which I thought to be chance occurrences and exaggerations. But I'm afraid I was wrong. So now in order to help her I must know everything. What kind of life a child would have growing up in the cult? My girl did mention having nightmares and growing up in a free sex environment. And she seems sexually frigid. Today she said that she is lesbian but I know that she had boyfriends before. I think she's just trying to tell me that she has a problem with sex and see if I would leave her because of it. She is also very distrustful and self-centered. Nevertheless, she is selfless and kind. She hates moving, small dirty apartments and being told what to do.

I'm doing my best to be patient and helpful, but I need to know more. A lot of the dirt comes out during our arguments, but I don't want to stress her more. I just need some information. Please help.


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